there's good news and there's bad news

the good news is, remember a couple days ago when i said the new star trek show was going to be the very best show ever?

well, i totally nailed that one. i mean, like, nailed it like i was a hammerhead shark that just ate m.c. hammer and got hold of mjolnir and was using it to hammer together a nail salon not even using any boards, just nailing together a whole bunch of nails.

whoooo!

watch out now, because i can't help going on and on about this show, so if you haven't seen it yet, go take a look and then come back before you read any further.

scene one is a bunch of aliens on their alien planet in a tizzy over something or other, alarms going off, big head honcho chick making her way into the command center room while there's this voiceover of number one talking about first contact being a sci-fi fairytale until it actually happens, and then the big reveal when they get it on the command center viewscreen ...

it's an old-school,
solo-nacelle 
federation scout ship
straight out of the 1970s star trek technical manual! 

squee! 

(however, this is also foreshadowing of the bad news ... stay tuned till the end for that part ...)

scene two is captain pike making breakfast for this other (very hot) captain and holy damn, can this guy make breakfast! and he's watching the day the earth stood still while he's doing it and it's the scene where the space guy is telling the earthlings what's up and why he's there and how his civilization has moved past violence and all that jazz, and i'm just totally eating all of it up like captain pike just made it for me for breakfast.

and here's the thing, the whole scene is captain pike and this chick talking and they clearly got it on good the night before and she's about to head out and tries to get him to stop hiding whatever secret he's hiding that's making him doubt whether he ought to go back to starfleet, which of course we know is the kind of secret that would make any of us totally lose our shit, and pike is all, "well, i don't know, i just really don't" and he's not answering his phone and he won't let down his guard to spill the beans to her ... but he's watching the freakin' day the earth stood still!

i'm like, dude. you're not even fooling yourself. you're supposed to be all pretzeled up with self-doubt and thinking maybe you should hang up your captain's suit, and the show you put on to chill with while making breakfast is the biggest "hey, earthlings, get your damned acts together" movie that's ever been made?

and even if he's maybe a little fooling himself, he's sure not fooling anybody else ... not captain hotbabe mcgirlfriend, not admiral "stop making me chase you down in a shuttlecraft, chris" ... and definitely not spock, who's the only one smart enough to figure out what happened to pike even though he's getting the zipped-lip treatment too.

see, this is how you show us what a kickass captain this dude is: at the moment when he's having the biggest woe-is-me crisis of his life, everybody who knows him is like, "dude, just get back in the chair already."

so okay, we've got our setup of, pike's got to get back on the enterprise and go rescue number one because the first contact bit from scene one went bad. now it's time for ...

the credits.

it's got the famous intro music hook. it's got the lights coming on along the outside of the enterprise. it's got pike saying his version of the famous "space, the final frontier" spiel.

it's got everything.

theremin, baby!

so, well, shit, an out-of-the-park pre-credits opening and out-of-the-park credits with an out-of-the-park "where no one has gone before" and theme song, something's got to land back in the park soon, right?

nopesies.

cut to vulcan. spock and some chick are having dinner. it's t'pring! i'm like, watch out, spock, this chick is bad news! and then they start talking and i'm like, leaping lirpas, no freaking wonder spock was ready to cut kirk's head off over this girl, she's goddamn amok-awesome!

no, really, not only is she as sizzling hot as the vulcan atmosphere outside the restaurant window behind them, she's hilarious! i mean, vulcan-style hilarious, but that makes it even better. and she's obviously head-over-heels for him. and they're both just talking to each other like they're delivering astrophysics lectures, but it's so sizzling the waiter literally has to tell them, "geez, you two, get a room!"

so now they're engaged, and they're back in her pad about to get it on -- and spock gets a phone call and says he'd better answer it! he's got a very spock-like "duty and matrimony can be complementary" excuse or something like that, and even though her legs are actually wrapped around him, she just says, "i remain skeptical" and lets him up.

dude. suddenly i am so on her side in the amok time episode where i always thought she was the bad guy.

we're like, four-ish scenes into this show so far, it's pretty much all been meals and talk, and it's already the best star trek i have seen since ... maybe ever.

i actually watched it again this morning and then skimmed through it again making notes about what i wanted to blog about here, and honestly, i just have to stop myself because i can't even close to do it justice. 

just let me say, kickass scene after kickass scene after kickass scene all leading up to pike saying "screw general order one" and bald-facedly interfering in these dipweed aliens' civilization to gort them out with his own version of the day the earth stood still speech.

with videos of our current political mess to show the aliens how they're heading into the world war iii situation that almost ended earth civilization in the star trek future history.

yeah baby. star trek doing social commentary from episode one!

and i've got like a whole other post's worth of stuff to say about cadet uhura. dayyum, lady!

so.

you've been dreading the bad news all the way through this, i know, and here it is.

remember that part about the federation scout ship from the old 1970s technical manual? when it came onscreen, msg wigged as much as i did, and said, "holy cow, that's straight out of the technical manual i had when i was a kid!"

yes, readers. he said, "had."

i like, literally had to make him pause the show right there so i could say, "what do you mean, you 'had' it when you were a kid? i hope to god you're going to tell me it was stolen or got burnt up in a house fire or something." (even though i'm pretty sure if he'd ever had a house fire i'd already know about it.)

no.

my boyfriend, the love of my life, bestest guy who has ever guyed on the planet actually had a copy of the original star trek technical manual (which i have never even laid eyes on in person), yes, had it and owned it from the time he was a kid up until this freaking century and then he just got rid of it because ... i don't even know why.

he made with some kind of weak-o explanation ... blah-blah-blah, voyager was awful, blah-blah-blah, couldn't even get through season one of enterprise, blah-blah-blah had it in a box of memorabilia that was only making him depressed and melancholy over the loss of all sense of wonder from his youth ... i mean, it was a lonnngggg excuse, and i finally just had to cut him off and say, "hit play on that remote before this gets to the point where i never talk to you again."

luckily, the show was so freaking awesome that by the end i was all sniffly and we were all cuddly and with a couple days gone by now, i think i'm mostly over the shock. also, a little googling tells me that instead of the $1,701 dollars i figured a copy would be going for, you can get these for maybe $50 or $100 these days, so. something that's now on my birthday list.

and there you have it, everybody.

live long and prosper!

strange. new. worlds.

folks.

you know i love me some star trek.

but holy hortamoley, i am freaking out over this new show that's starting tomorrow.

it's going to be, like, the very best show ever.

ready to beam up and then some!

scary space rpg part ten!

(we roll up characters here!)

(part one is here!)

(part two is here!)

(part three is here!)

(part four is here!)

(part five is here!)

(part six is here!)

(part seven is here!)

(part eight is here!)

(part nine is here!)

GMSG: So are we all ready to go for the session?

Ariel: Ready spaghetti!

Sasha: Ready McFreddy!

Akane: I'm ready, except failed with rhyming.

Claire: Same here.

Elle: Geez, you two. Hettie is right there.

Hettie: It's fine, Elle. I'm singularly unambitious about filling out the ass end of a poetic triplet. In any case, I'm ready as well, and you'll be glad to hear that when I leveled the good Reverend McAlastair up, I buffed my Combat value and added Athletics and Zero-G skills.

Elle: That's a start at least.

GMSG: Speaking of starts, you've made it to the door that leads to the power node compartment.

Claire: Is it open?

GMSG: No. It's a secure area, so there's a biometric access panel keyed to authorized personnel.

Claire: Can I bypass it with my toolkit?

GMSG: You can certainly try. Roll Intellect + Mechanical Repair.

Claire: Any chance you'll let me use Jury Rigging or Engineering instead for the higher bonus?

GMSG: Sure.

Claire: Woohoo! 31! Way below what I needed

GMSG: Nice. You hear the lock disengage, but remember, there's minimal power in this area, so the door doesn't open on its own.

Sasha: Step aside, Gears. I'll womanhandle it open. What do I roll, Warden, Strength + Athletics?

GMSG: No, it's not a terribly strenuous task. The door slides open without much trouble. But if you need to get it open or closed quickly, you'll have to roll. The area inside is about a two-meter by four-meter space, with control panels on the far wall flanking a central power conduit. It's a cylinder that runs floor to ceiling and is as big around as a tire. Circuitry tracks up and down it top to bottom, putting out a dull glow.

Claire: I'll go in and get straight to work trying to connect it back up.

Akane: A thought from Yamaguchi.

Claire: Yes?

Akane: It's good to get it working fast ... but maybe better to get it working in a way spider-robots can't notice?

Ariel: Ooh, that's smart! By the way, I'm gonna get in out of the hall where it's maybe a little safer.

Sasha: Yah, everybody get in and I'll hang in the doorway keeping an eye out.

Elle: Wouldn't it be better to close the door and avoid notice?

Sasha: You're not there.

Elle: No, but I can hear you and Ms. McDiggitt over your suit comms, and I'm incredibly intelligent, so I think I can figure out where you are and what's going on.

Sasha: Okay, well, shows what you know, Blue, because the spidey-bugs basically know where we are already, and this way I can at least see them coming instead of opening the door when we're done and whoops! there's an ambush.

Hettie: Rev Mackie feels obligated to point out that we now know the metal beasties can make themselves all but invisible with their hologram technology, so you really won't be able to see them coming.

Sasha: Dammit. Okay, everybody in and we'll close the door.

GMSG: It's a pretty cozy fit with all six of you in there --

Akane: Yamaguchi is very small, remember.

GMSG: Yes, but Narcy and Stickshift are in bulky vacc suits. Anyway, you're not sardines, but there's not much room for people to pace around while Panda is working.

Claire: So can I tell what my options are, as far as maybe turning stuff on without immediately alerting the spiderbot army what we're up to?

GMSG: Your first step is to use the failsafe controls to boot the node up from the minimal power setting. Then you'll be able to use the full computer terminal that manages the node's functions. The terminal will let you assess what kind of configurations you can try.

Claire: Okay, well, I'll get that going, then.

GMSG: No rolls needed - it's pretty simple. The terminal boots up and takes a few minutes running startup routines and diagnostics, then you get a big set of menus.

Claire: So, step one, I want to see how to route power to the fuel pumps up in the docking hub. Once I know the process for that, I'll start looking to see if there's a sneaky way to do it, like setting a timer so it activates right when we get back to the hub. Or like, if I can just send a little power to a terminal up there, and then use that to bring the whole shebang online locally once we're back there.

GMSG: You can see pretty quickly that in order to tie into a distant terminal remotely, you'd have to power up the computer network from here to there. That would be really difficult to do clandestinely. If the spiders have any access to the station's computer systems, and are bothering to keep an eye on them, they would notice.

Sasha: And be waiting for us when we got to that terminal. No dice on that one.

Claire: What about the timer idea?

GMSG: A little more feasible, but you'd have to code some new routines into the system to manage that; these controls are pretty much designed to route and re-route power based on everyday usage fluctuations or emergency situations, so they're pretty much intended to turn things on or off immediately.

Claire: Great. I'm not a programmer, and our resident hacking whiz is back on the ship.

Akane: Yamaguchi has ability with computers too, she reminds.

Sasha: Nice, Doc.

GMSG: The two of you would have to work together, since Panda understands the engineering and Yamaguchi would need to do the coding. Do you want to get started on it?

Claire: Well, first ... is there any way I can use this panel to see what those other powered-up systems are that our sensors detected?

GMSG: Yes. It looks like there's full power to something called, "AI Core" in the central sphere of the station. There's also power in several sections of the main ring that surrounds the sphere.

Elle: AI. Great. So basically the station's mega-genius computer must have gone nuts and killed everyone.

Claire: What are those sections in the main ring? Anything special?

GMSG: They're part of the life support systems for something called "Total Immersion Pods."

Sasha: Whoa, whoa, whoa ... didn't you say last time that they put people in suspended animation for some of the VR games here or something?

GMSG: Yes.

Sasha: So if the pods are on, there must still be people in at least some of them.

Ariel: That's terrible!

Sasha: Yeah, sucks to be them I guess.

Ariel: So ... so ... so if the AI is crazy and keeping people alive in pods, then maybe it really did suck Spanky's brain out from his head and store him in its memory banks!

Elle: Is that even possible?

GMSG: Cybernetics and AI are both Master skills on the skill tree. Your Hacking is just a step down from AI, but Cybernetics isn't related to any of your skills. So you could roll Intellect plus Hacking to have a guess about whether an AI could hold and mimic a complete human neural pattern, but you'd have to roll Intellect plus Cybernetics at disadvantage to know if a transfer that complex is possible.

Elle: I get the Hacking roll pretty easy, then 38 and 24 on my disadvantage Cybernetics roll, so I get that too. Because I'm incredibly intelligent.

GMSG: Then you know a really powerful AI could do the pattern simulation, and maybe as an android you happened across some mind-machine trivia that makes you think it's at least theoretically possible that a suitable interface could be built.

Ariel: We've got to go save Spanky then!

Elle: Actually, I didn't say I told you any of that.

Ariel: What! You have to tell me!

Elle: I absolutely do not.

Ariel: But I'll be so mad at you!

Elle: How can you be mad if I don't tell you?

Ariel: No, Elle, I'll be mad at you!

Elle: Pff. Of course you won't. Luckily, we don't have to find out, because Pol has no motivation to spare Stickshift's feelings or keep you from running off and doing something stupid. So he does immediately say, "Interesting. Possible on a theoretical level, if technically very challenging."

Ariel: Then we have to go rescue him!

Sasha: Not me, sister. 

Ariel: But, but we're marines! We never leave a man behind!

Sasha: Ehhh ... I don't remember anything about "We never leave a simulation of a man behind," though. 

Ariel: Well what about leaving a woman behind? Because I'm going to try to go save him.

Sasha: I kinda feel like we have a responsibility to all these live people here to try and get them off the station though, don't you?

Ariel: I ... but in that case, what about those people in the pods? They're alive.

Elle: Conceivably, the AI could have left those pods powered up as bait to lure people down there. We have no way of knowing whether they're occupied.

Ariel: I can't believe you're being so heartless!

Elle: Literally do not have a heart. This isn't new information to anyone is it?

Claire: Is it too late for me to point out that I never said, "Panda tells everyone what she finds out from the readout?"

GMSG: I'm afraid so.

Claire: Well, fartles.

GMSG: But it's not too late for you to say, "While Stickshift is arguing with Narcy and Pol, I get started working to set up that timer."

Claire: Great! Let's pretend I said that.

Akane: We may also pretend Yamaguchi started helping.

GMSG: Okay. Claire, roll Intellect + Engineering for Panda. Akane, roll Intellect + Computers for Dr. Yamaguchi.

Claire: Hey, 22! Critical success!

Akane: My dice are 53, very close to 57 that I needed, but under.

GMSG: Claire, while getting the timer set up, you also figure out a way to get the power node to send an activation pulse toward the hub every few seconds, followed immediately by a de-activation pulse if no one hits the right key on the hub's power node terminal. If you want to, you can configure it so that once the timer goes off, it starts sending that pulse pattern instead of just lighting the whole place up.

Claire: I feel like I'm almost getting why that would be helpful.

GMSG: If the timer just turns on the hub's power node, any spiders in the neighborhood might recognize that someone has turned the juice back on as soon as it happens.

Claire: And they'd be on alert to try and stop us, or radio back to the AI in the core that it needs to shut things back down.

GMSG: Exactly. If you get back to the hub too early, you'll just be hanging out waiting --

Sasha: Fighting off spiders the whole time.

GMSG: Yes, and if you get back after the power's been on too long, they might lock it back down before you can activate the fuel pumps.

Claire: Okay, let's do the pulse thing. How long does Panda think it will take us to hoof it back to the hub?

GMSG: Hard to say. You've got several hundred feet of ladders to climb and low-G tunnels to navigate ... definitely more than ten minutes, maybe more than 20.

Claire: I'll set the timer for, ehh, 14 minutes after we get ready to head back.

Ariel: We're not ready yet!

Claire: Can we assume Panda gets filled in about the argument? That critical success has to mean she was laser-focused on the task and didn't hear any details.

GMSG: I think she would have to butt in and get them to stop squabbling. Is she going to try that?

Claire: Definitely. Aers, Elle, Sash, do you guys shut up for long enough to tell me what the fight's about?

Sasha: There's no fight as far as Narcy's concerned. Just a big "Nope, no way" on Stickshift's plan.

Elle: Pol would be willing to see if Ms. Fatale has a useful perspective to interject.

Ariel: I'm pretty worked up, but if nobody's arguing back I guess I'd try to get Panda on my side by telling her what's going on.

Claire: Great. Then what Panda says is, there have to be airlocks on the core module for them to get out and do maintenance on the hull. You'd have a lot better chance of getting into the AI's HQ or the sleep pods if we get the ship loose and maneuver where you can jump straight there instead of hiking from this ring down to the next ring where there are probably tons of spiders and other security measures.

Ariel: Oh. Well ... I ... um ...

Sasha: It's best of both worlds, girl. You get to help shuffle the civvies off to safety, and you get a shortcut to suicide-ville if that's really where you're set on going.

Ariel: That makes sense, I guess. And even if it didn't, Stickshift's probably not bright enough to figure out why not. But Panda better come through with giving me a ride to that AI core once we figure out the ship stuff.

Claire: Pinky swear.

Ariel: I suppose that's all right then. If you're pinky swearing and all.

Hettie: The reverend has a thought and raises her hand.

Sasha: Geez, Rev, this ain't Sunday school. If something's on your mind, just say it.

Hettie: Well, it occurs to me that we've turned on this power node, and the enemy knows that we're here, assuming those spiders have any kind of transmitters in them.

Claire: Hmm. Maybe I should have taken one apart and seen whether they do, but it's probably a fair bet.What's your point?

Hettie: I'm just wondering if there's something we could do with the power node to make them think that the thing we're trying to do isn't the thing we're trying to do.

Elle: That's an excellent thought. 

Sasha: Hey, I didn't tell Pol the Rev said that, and I didn't hear Aers say Stickshift told Pol either, so I hope you're not about to have him say something smart-assy or even just something smart.

Elle: No, I was giving Harriet a compliment. That's all.

Sasha: Okay, but my eye is on you!

GMSG: Did you have something in mind, Hettie?

Hettie: Even if I did, I don't think Rev Mackie has the technical wherewithal to suggest anything specific.

Claire: Well, Panda does. We've seen that tube for the train in the axis of the station, but have we actually seen the train in it?

Sasha: I saw the train in it both times.

Ariel: Me too!

Akane: Yes, but was it a train drawing to show us the train was there, or just a train drawing to show us a train can go there?

GMSG: There was not actually a train at either of the junctions you saw.

Claire: Excellent. Here's what Panda's gonna do, then. I'll use the power node to turn on the train station at the top of this spoke we came down, and the train station in the main ring and the lower ring and the solar power array too, if I can access them. But not the power to the part of the tube that goes to the docking hub.

Ariel: Wait, you're going to turn on the train but then make us walk?

Claire: Yeppers. With any luck, the AI or the spiders will think we're trying to call the train here so we can get a ride deeper into the station.

Ariel: But Stickshift does want to get a ride deeper into the station.

Claire: Exactly. Setting up the train to come here but not to the docking hub makes it look like we bought into the simulation of Spanky Spannerman and we're trying to rescue him or do a commando raid and take out the AI.

Elle: Claire my dear, I, Elle am telling you that's another excellent idea, which my character does not know about and does not speak to. But he does say, "Can someone tell me what's going on?"

Ariel: We're planning things, Pol. I think I like that plan, Ms. Fatale. And also maybe it'll give me a chance to call the train and head deeper into the station on my own, since the robots will be thrown off your tracks.

Akane: Um ... if I am artificially intelligent and wanting to protect myself, I would make the train full of spiders that could jump out at you when the transportation comes from your call.

Ariel: Ooh, yikes, good point.

Sasha: So the plan is, turn the trains on, then set the timer so we can hustle to the docking hub and wait there for the power to come back. When we get to the top of the spoke, are we actually going to call the train?

Claire: That's a toughie. If we don't, the baddies might get suspicious. But if we do, that train might get to our depot pretty quick, and then if they don't find us, they might power up the last bit of track and zoom ahead of us on the train while we're still trucking down the access tunnel.

Elle: Has anybody let me in on this yet?

Ariel: I guess probably I would, since probably you're being a pain about it and talking talking talking in my ear so I can't listen to Panda anyhow.

Elle: Great. So the obvious answer according to Pol is, don't call the train right away. Have somebody hang out in the depot on the train switch, and they push the button after everybody else has a few minutes' head start.

Hettie: Whoever stays behind would need to have Zero G so they can catch up to the others quickly.

Claire: Well, it can't be Panda. She's got to work the docking hub power node.

Elle: It feels almost eerily prescient that you had Rev Mackie take that skill when you leveled up, Het.

Hettie: I don't know that I'm entirely happy about my foresight now, but I'll let everyone else know I think I really got the hang of moving down that tunnel in minimal gravity, so I can be the one to stay behind.

Sasha: Nice knowing you, Rev.

Claire: Actually, if we get to the docking hub quick enough, and I see the tracks to the hub have been activated, maybe I can shut the track power back down before the train gets to the reverend's position. Then she'd just have to outrun the spiders, not the train.

Hettie: I'll take what I can get.

GMSG: Claire, activating the other power systems is totally routine if you're not trying to be sneaky about it or rush the process.

Claire: I'm hoping the AI will think it's being clever by stuffing the train full of spiders and then letting us bring the bad guys down on ourselves. So I'm not going to hurry the job and maybe botch it.

GMSG: Working at a normal speed, you don't even need a roll. You get all the train depots and the tracks in between them working without difficulty.

Akane: Except for tracks to docking hub!

GMSG: Yes, except for those.

Claire: All right then, gal pals. Sarge, if you'll get the door open, I'll hit the timer start button as soon as the way out is clear.

(okay, good stopping place for this post, I think! tune in next time for more exciting rpg-ing!)

scary space rpg part nine!

(we roll up characters here!)

(part one is here!)

(part two is here!)

(part three is here!)

(part four is here!)

(part five is here!)

(part six is here!)

(part seven is here!)

(part eight is here!)

GMSG: Okay, Pandora gets the last fuse box welded shut.

Claire: There. That should keep the spiders out of the wiring for a while at least.

Sasha: Let's get a move on, then.

GMSG: It's just a few more minutes of bouncing along in low gravity before your access tunnel ends at another closed door. You've reached the upper ring. Oh, but along the way you came across an open hatch into the tube-train's tunnel.

Elle: Probably where the spider that came at you from the front got in.

Sasha: We'll shut that hatch. Should we weld it too?

GMSG: Like I said, you've been passing maintenance hatches like that on a regular basis since you left the docking hub. So you can weld it if you like, but there are eight or ten others something could come in through.

Elle: I like the way you said "something" instead of "spiders," just to let us know there's other stuff in here we should be worried about.

Ariel: I don't like that! Not at all!

Sasha: Assuming this door to the upper ring needs to be cranked open like the one on the other end did, Narcy keeps watch again while Panda works the mechanism.

GMSG: Beyond the door, once you get it open, you find a train depot for the tube-train. It's basically a drum-shaped area wider than the central axis of the station. Huge, hollow spokes connect the drum to the ring, with gantries and walkways coming out of the spokes and meeting at the train platform that runs along one side of the train tube. People and cargo could be carried across the gantries by tram. Rotational gravity means that the cylindrical sides of the drum act as a floor for the area when the artificial gravity is off. Your access tunnel opens onto that floor.

Akane: Excuse me, game master?

Ariel: psst! It's "warden."

Akane: Oh, yes ... warden? Does this mean hollow spokes are just deep pits now?

GMSG: Very deep. But like the docking hub did, and like the central axis does, they have access tunnels for use in emergencies, so there will be a way to climb down. You find one pretty quickly.

Akane: A very long ladder climb, though ... Yamaguchi Daika has a strength of weakling ...

Hettie: Rev. Mackie is in the same boat.

GMSG: Yep. Everyone with a Strength less than 30 will need to make a Body Save to avoid taking Stress in the form of exhaustion.

Sasha: Narcy laughs at the idea of a Strength less than 30.

Claire: Panda rolls a 58. Not even close to a save.

Akane: 29 for Yamaguchi. It's close to a save, but not one.

Hettie: I roll a 05, so the Rev is bolstered by the power of prayer.

Ariel: My strength is 31. Whew!

GMSG: One point of Stress for Panda and the doc, then. You reach the bottom of the very, very long ladder. There's a hatch, which should open up in a service area of the ring, a couple of small rooms off-limits to everyone but station staff.

Claire: Any chance the power node we're looking for is right there in the service area?

GMSG: Based on the scans you did earlier, you know it's close to the spoke you climbed down, but on the opposite side of the ring. You'll have to exit the service area and cross the promenade that runs along the central curve of the ring. It's about 40 meters across.

Ariel: That doesn't sound too far!

Elle: Assuming something doesn't kill you before you get out of the service area.

Sasha: Whatever. Let's get this door open and check out these service rooms.

GMSG: This one's a simple hatch. When you open it, you're looking out into a small cubby with a communications station on one side, a sliding panel door on the other, and an exit to the promenade straight ahead.

Sasha: Pistol ready. I slide that panel door open.

GMSG: It looks like a utility closet -- but there's a dead body in there, slumped in a corner between a floor-cleaning unit and some shelves stacked with cleaning supplies and appliances. It's in what looks like a flight crew jumpsuit, and it's been there long enough that the rot has mostly dried up and the smell isn't gruesomely strong.

Sasha: Can I tell what killed 'em?

GMSG: Not without a much closer look. But you do see that one leg looks badly broken.

Elle: Critical fail on his body save when he was climbing down the ladder, right?

GMSG: No comment.

Akane: Yamaguchi can coronate it if asked. Be coroner for? Use first aid or pathology to examine. But are we all on ladder still? Or sardines together in the cubby?

GMSG: No one has said anything about what they do at the bottom of the ladder except Sash.

Claire: Okay, well if Narcy moved to slide that door open, is there room in the cubby for me to get down from the ladder?

GMSG: Yes. One or two other people could make a tight fit in the cubby with Narcy, and someone else could stand at the bottom of the ladder shaft. But at least one person would still be on the ladder itself.

Sasha: Well, I'm stepping into the closet to check if Broke-leg Bob here has any weapons or ammo.

GMSG: That will let everyone get down.

Akane: Theory! Broke-leg Bob is hidden in closet. Door to ladder is closed. Door to closet is closed. Someone must have helped Broke-leg into closet and closed doors to leave him safe.

Elle: Pretty good thinking. For a human.

Akane: Apparently I learn it at dog dentistry school.

Sasha: Congratulations, Doc. Can we get back to my looting over here?

GMSG: The body has a flashlight, another pistol, and one spare clip.

Sasha: I'll pass the pistol to Stickshift, but I'm keeping the clip. You've got your vibechete -- if I run out of ammo, all I have to switch to is frag grenades.

Ariel: I don't think you should use those in here!

Sasha: Not planning to, just sayin'. Everybody ready to head into the big hallway?

Akane: We don't want a diagnosis of dead Bob?

Sasha: Eh. Seems like he died of, "Not something you can shoot at," so I'm not sure it matters.

Hettie: Rev. Mackie will take a moment to say a few words over the body, at least. Hmm. In the process, do I notice any chemicals in those cleaning supplies that might have a use?

GMSG: Roll Intellect + Chemistry.

Hettie: I get a 61, but I needed 55 or under.

GMSG: Just having Chemistry, you know a couple of things are flammable, and bleach and ammonia make chlorine gas, but nothing MacGuyver-y jumps out at you.

Sasha: Much as I'd like to hang out and destroy my lungs huffing chlorine gas, are we good to go yet? No complaints? Okay, then I open the promenade door.

GMSG: It's dark out there. The illumination from your suit lights sheds a paltry circle out across the floor, glancing off dusty kiosks and stark, scattered souvenirs knocked from their shelves long ago.

Elle: No piles of bodies? Pol hasn't entirely let go of his plague theory yet.

GMSG: Sorry. There's evidence of a lot of people fleeing through here -- abandoned luggage and fallen disposable cups. But no corpses. At least not in the immediate vicinity.

Claire: Can we see across to where the power node is supposed to be?

GMSG: No. The suit lights don't reach that far, and besides the kiosks, there's also a huge, curved ramp that angles up into the spoke-hole in the ceiling. When the artificial gravity was on, people could walk or ride trams directly from the ring floor along curve of the ramp to enter the spoke and then travel to the train depot in the central spindle.

Ariel: Well that sounds a lot better than having to climb a ladder all the way back up.

Sasha: Don't get your hopes up, Stickshift. Even if we get the gravity on along with the power node, I'm not sure how smart it is to try to make that walk. If the spiders shut things back down before we get to the top ... wheeeeeSPLAT!

Ariel: Oh. Poop. I'm so tired of ladders.

Elle: Don't lose too much hope, Ms. McDiggitt. Maybe once the power is back on, you'll find out you're being chased by something fast, and you won't have any choice but to run for it up the ramp.

Ariel: That doesn't help!

Sasha: Yeah, look, Blue, we've got the Rev down here for moral support. Stick to your own wheelhouse, okay? I'm heading out into the corridor now.

GMSG: It's incredibly quiet. Your footsteps disturb a thin sheet of dust on the carpet. This part of the station hasn't had any powered air circulation for years. The air smells stale. 

Claire: Can I see anything with my IR goggles that the suit lights and flashlights aren't revealing?

GMSG: Not much. The station's rotating, which means that for about half of each rotation, the inner circumference of the ring is in sunlight, and for the other half, the outer circumference is. But the rotation rate is fast enough that very little heat differential can build up, so almost everything is the same temperature. Nearby objects reflect some of the light from infrared sources -- that's you -- and you can faintly see the interior of the ring curving up and away in the distance to either side. That's about it.

Akane: So much science! You're excellent for this Warden job, MSG.

Elle: Or he's just making it sound good off the top of his head.

Hettie: Is there any practical difference?

Sasha: I'm heading carefully out and making my way around that big ramp, looking either way -- and up at the ceiling -- as I go.

GMSG: How closely spaced are all of you?

Ariel: I don't know if I like that question ... can I say, "Just close enough?"

Sasha: Nobody should be tripping over the heels of whoever's in front of them, but I'm assuming we keep within five or six feet of each other. And by "assuming," I mean I glance back from time to time and tell people to tighten up or spread out if I have to.

GMSG: Okay, as Narcy Danger draws even with the central ramp, everyone notices some scattered flickerings of light. Can I get Speed checks all around?

Sasha: Fail with a 42.

Claire: I make it with 33!

Akane: My Speed's okay -- and the dice say 29, so, success.

Hettie: Rev. Mackie gets a nice 09.

Ariel: Poop, 46. That's 10 over what I needed.

Elle: Pol is with the reverend. 09.

GMSG: You see one of the spiders crawl down from around the far edge of the ramp and leap at Narcy. Another scurries up to the top of a kiosk and almost instantly pounces on Yamaguchi's back. Everything's happening lightning fast and almost simultaneously. Elle, Hettie, write a quick note about what you're doing. Ready? Okay, Hettie, what's yours say?

Hettie: "Stab Doc spider vibech"

GMSG: Elle?

Elle: "Yell, 'Holograms!'"

GMSG: Narcy and Stickshift hear you loud and clear, but to everyone else it's a muffled sound coming through the helmet material. Het, roll Intellect to see if you can make it out and process it quickly enough to change your action.

Hettie: 82, I'm afraid.

GMSG: Okay, make your combat roll. You have advantage because the spider seems to be presenting a pretty steady target, for some reason.

Hettie: Ah. How "fortunate" for me. All right, I roll ... 73, and ... 87.

GMSG: Akane, you hear the whizz of a vibechete passing extremely close to your back, and when you try to see what's up, it appears a spider-bot is latched onto your back -- but you can't feel any claws or weight.

Akane: Yamaguchi yells, very shrill. "It's holograms! Everybody, don't kill each other!"

GMSG: Claire, how about Panda?

Claire: I'm looking around with my IR goggles. Can they help me tell if both spiders are fake?

GMSG: Both of them look ghosty to you -- but you see a third spider creeping around another kiosk on the far side of Narcy. You can see it plain as day in IR.

Claire: I point at it and yell, "That one's real!"

Sasha: My turn next, right? I'll shoot the one Ms. Fatale's pointing at.

GMSG: It's the spiders' turn, actually. The one leaping at you lands and clutches at your helmet with its legs. Claire, the real spider shifts its attention to Panda and scuttles around Narcy to attack. It rolls a 12, slashing you with a pointy claw at the end of its leg. Armor save?

Claire: 64. Fail-o.

GMSG: Damage is 13 points.

Claire: Ow!

GMSG: The one that was clawing Yamaguchi leaps onto Stickshift instead. Sash, when you look where Panda's pointing, you kind of see a moving blob of shadowy haze whip past you, clattering as it goes. It skewers her on one of its claws. Between the optical haze and the hologram spider on your helmet, you'll have disadvantage if you fire at the one on Panda.

Sasha: Whatev. Blam! Dammit, one roll's an 84. Second action, shoot again. Oh crap, the worse roll is 88.

GMSG: You hit Panda instead. Claire, make another Armor Save.

Claire: Yeah, no. That's a 78.

GMSG: Sash, roll your damage. Oh, and each one of those failed saves is a point of stress for Panda.

Claire: Suuuuper.

Sasha: Ouch, 18 points. Narcy says, "Damn, sorry, babe!"

GMSG: Aers, you realize right away that the one attacking you isn't real. What do you want to do?

Ariel: I guess I shoot my laser cutter at the one attacking Panda.

Akane: Wait! It's broken!

Ariel: Yeah, but Stickshift doesn't know that. It just made a breaky noise when she tried to smash that other spider ... and who knows if she's smart enough to even remember that.

GMSG: Roll to attack with disadvantage.

Ariel: Oh, it works? I roll ... 84 and 87. Dang.

GMSG: It doesn't work. The rolls were just to see whether it failed to go off or if it blew up. No critical fail, so it just clicks and does nothing.

Ariel: Yikes! Well, I drop it and get out my Vibechete then.

GMSG: New Speed Checks.

Claire: 80.

Elle: 16.

Sasha: 19!

Hettie: 39 succeeds for me.

Ariel: Me too with a 27!

Akane: It's 17 for Yamaguchi. Only Ms. Fatale is slowpoking this round.

GMSG: Elle, what's Pol do or say?

Elle: I tell the marines the camouflaged one has to be the hologram projectors using optical interference by beaming light at the spider to cancel out the light reflecting off it. If they turn of their helmet lights, the optical interference will be the only light hitting that spider, and then they'll be able to see it.

Ariel: I totally do not understand that at all, so I'm pretty sure Stickshift doesn't either.

GMSG: It's also too much to say in the time-frame you've got. You could say, "The camouflage is optical interference! Turn off your lights!" But not all the rest of it.

Elle: Well, that's what I say then.

Sasha: Sorry, Narcy sort of gets it, but I don't want to be in the dark, so let's not.

Elle: You won't be in the dark, because --

GMSG: Already said more than Pol can, Elle. You'll have to wait a round. Akane, it's Yamaguchi's turn next.

Akane: Stun baton against real spider! But the rolls are 90 and 25. Disadvantage, right? Anyway, 90 is first so it doesn't matter.

GMSG: Narcy?

Sasha: Our only techie is about to go down, so I'll try to grab the spider and yank it off her. What's that, like a Combat roll and a Strength roll?

GMSG: Go for it. No disadvantage, because you just have to hit it and grab, not actually get through armor or anything.

Sasha: 67 to hit, 21 on Strength roll. My combat's 54 and another 15 for Close-Quarters Combat means I needed anything under 69 to hit.

GMSG: It tries an opposed Strength roll, but it doesn't beat you, so you manage to pull it off.

Claire: Whew!

GMSG: Aers, it's your turn.

Ariel: I'm rushing over to vibechete whatever Sarge is holding! Um, whoops. I needed 64 or less, and I rolled 66.

GMSG: Critical failure. Sash, make an Armor Save.

Sasha: 42, which succeeds with my vacc suit's bonus.

GMSG: Hettie, it's the reverend's turn. What do you do?

Hettie: I guess I'll try to slash this thing Sarge is holding with my vibechete. Is this going to be disadvantage because it's all blurry?

GMSG: No, its location is pretty obvious now with Narcy holding it. Kind of a wrestling match going on, though, so don't critical fail or you'll hit her instead of the spiderbot.

Sasha: I can take it, Rev. My health is through the roof.

Hettie: Wow, would you look at that? 22.

GMSG: A critical success hacks off a limb with a vibechete, in addition to your damage.

Hettie: Great. Two dice of damage is ... 7.

GMSG: Critter's turn. It tries to wrestle free of Narcy's grip. Opposed Strength check, Sasha. 

Sasha: 06. I'm basically using it to do a total flex pose. Look at these guns.

Elle: You're wearing a spacesuit, Sash.

Sasha: That's what a mass-o-muscles Narcy is.

GMSG: Well, it's not a critical success, but the spider failed with a 70, so it doesn't escape. Claire, what does Panda do?

Claire: I'm going to hang back from the fight and keep looking for other bots. Also, I'll ask the doc for some of those pain pills she mentioned earlier.

GMSG: New Speed Checks.

Elle: 62.

Sasha: 40. Fail.

Hettie: I roll a very nice 15.

Ariel: 03 for Stickshift!

Akane: Yamaguchi is at 04.

Claire: 32 for Panda, which is a success.

GMSG: Ariel, you're up.

Ariel: Vibechete!

GMSG: You still have disadvantage from the hologram spiderbot on your head.

Ariel: Ugh. Seriously? I roll a 66 and 84.

GMSG: The 66 is worse. You hit Narcy. Roll damage.

Sasha: Hey, don't I get an Armor Save?

GMSG: That's two 66's in a row on you, I'm afraid. I was actually nice to let you roll a save the first time.

Ariel: 10 points, Sash.

Sasha: Dammit!

GMSG: Akane, what does Doctor Yamaguchi do?

Akane: Find medicinal assistance for Patient Fatale.

GMSG: Okay. Hettie, what about the reverend?

Hettie: I'll give it another go with this vibechete. And it's another hit with a 19. Not critical this time, unfortunately.

GMSG: It fails its Armor Save. Roll damage.

Hettie: Ah, that's much better. Fourteen points.

GMSG: The spiderbot shudders and sparks a little, but keeps thrashing in Narcy's grip. Claire, what's Panda do?

Claire: I'm popping that pill.

GMSG: Roll a d10 to see how much Health you get back. You also regain 1 stress.

Claire: I'll take it. I roll a 6, which I'll also take. Anything above average is a win in my book.

GMSG: Beasties go. The holographic spider disappears from Narcy's helmet, and Rev. Mackie's head is suddenly engulfed in a swirl of kaleidoscopic colors, effectively blinding her. It's also extremely disturbing and disorienting, so roll a Sanity Save.

Hettie: That's my best one, but I miss with a 57.

GMSG: Mark a point of stress. Sash, the bot in Narcy's grip gives up on breaking loose and slashes at you with a claw ... but misses, barely. Your turn.

Sasha: Can I try to like, physically rip the arms off this thing where I'm holding it?

GMSG: It's pretty tough. Roll a strength check, and if it's a critical success, you pull off an arm. Any success and I'll let you do a d10 damage to it, considering how strong you are.

Sasha: Watch this, baby! Darn, 52. No mad-Wookiee rampage, but my damage is ... dammit, dice on the floor. I'm keeping it, whatever the roll is!

Ariel: Maybe don't throw the dice quite as hard as Sarge is yanking on the spider legs.

Sasha: Hush, you. Where the hell did it go?

Elle: I think it pinged off my foot and went under Hettie's chair.

Sasha: Okay, got it ... yes! 9 points!

GMSG: That's actually enough to take it apart even without a crit. It sputters and jerks and then stops moving.

Sasha: Hah! Eat it, spiderbot!

GMSG: Elle, it's Pol's turn.

Elle: I say, "You people need to rig something to put out optical interference the same way that robot was being disguised."

Hettie: Is Rev. Mackie's head still engulfed in a lightshow? If it is, I agree with that. Oh, wait, no, only Narcy and Stickshift can hear him, I guess.

Sasha: I'll pass it along ... or is it time for new Speed Checks?

GMSG: There's no immediate threat ... and right after Pol broadcasts that, all the holograms disappear.

Elle: Looks like they don't want us to test my idea.

Sasha: Is there a clear path to this service-maintenance shack or whatever?

GMSG: Yes. Once you make it past the ramp, you can see the door with a "Station Personnel Only" sign on it.

Sasha: On the way there, I'll say, "Hey, McDiggitt -- did I give you Broke-leg Bob's pistol for no damn reason?"

Ariel: Oh! That's right, it's right here on my suit belt. I'll remember it next time, I promise! Especially since my laser cutter is kaput.

Hettie: Can we all say a little prayer that there isn't a "next time" anytime soon?

Sasha: You say whatever floats your pew, Rev.

Akane: I think it can't hurt! Is marine training skipping lessons on morale now, Sergeant?

Sasha: Fine. When she's done, I'll give an "Amen."

Ariel: I'm more worried about whether we're at the door yet.

GMSG: Yes. And I think this is a good place to wrap the session up. Everybody gets 10 XP for the session, and Narcy gets a bonus point for killing the spiderbot. Hettie, since it was Charmaigne's first session, you get to level up.

Elle: Pol recommends you take a more applicable skill with some of those improvement points.

Hettie: I don't think the characters actually know when leveling up happens for one another, dear, but I'll take it as advice from you.

Elle: I would never be as rude as Pol.

Claire: Maybe let's not debate that, how about.

(Tune in next time to see what happens in Session Three!)

poem!

i had a week
with all my peeps
and each peep was all i could want:

while cheek-to-cheek

and in our sleeps

we jigged, jammed, and went on a jaunt!

next week i see

my peeps and me

wrapped up in each other again ...

simplicity:

we loving we

and now can i get an "amen!"

early anniversary present!

guys and gals, let me tell you, our computer is o-l-d with a capital whatever-the-egyptian-heiroglyph-for-"old"-is.

now, before you think about that and about the title and put them together and go, "wow, claire, awesome! you're getting a new computer for your anniversary???" the answer is nope, not this year at least.

but not only is the computer old, it hasn't even had an operating system update in years, it's started giving us cranky messages like, "this feature of microsoft word will not function on an os created before the invention of the horse." so msg decided maybe we better update our os. (cool lingo-bingo coincidence: "os" without the periods is like, greek for "bone" and is the root word in "ossified." it's also right there up front in the word "fossil," but i think that's another coincidence and not really etymology.)

unfortunately, the update says it takes 12.1 gigabytes of storage, and when msg checked our hard drive, it said it had 12.125gb of free space. meaning, even if it would let us do the update, we'd never be able to save another document again.

so msg goes looking for things to delete and finds a bunch of duplicate art files that are in photoshop with a shit-ton of layers, which is a big score because those eat the memory up like a hog in chips. he also threw out some video files and other major oink-o drive-space eaters. then he started looking around in his naughty folders for disposable stuff ... and some of the naughty folders include some of my photos and videos, and he peeked in there to see if there were some he wouldn't mind moving to an external drive, or some where we'd taken a bunch of repetitious shots from the same angle. (akane tweeted about this and made it sound a lot more like he was going crazy throwing out precious memories right and left, which was sweet of her to worry about but wasn't really the case.)

anyway, in one of the folders he found a photo shoot where there were a lot of pics "waiting" to be retouched, and they were all in photoshop format, i.e., giganto-sized files for no good reason.

so he went in and looked at them while saving them into png files, and on a couple, he stopped and did the touchup stuff (like fixing my shiny-ass forehead) that had been done on all the other files from the shoot like, 11 years ago.

and then last night he sat down and just went through all the rest of them and fixed them up too.

here are a couple!

but the anniversary present wasn't finding the pictures, or keeping the pictures, or touching up the pictures.

it was reminding me of our love in its youth, when it was bold and swaggering and full of itself, and I felt alive in the newness of everything. when a precious wash of daylight through our bedroom windows could put a glow on the whole world.

it's not that our love was better in those days, but that it was such an adventure. we had so much still to learn about each other, and you can just see in these pictures how full of eager amazement we were to do that learning.

i think i still have a trick or two to show him. and he still surprises me from time to time ...

seeing these pictures just reminded us both, i think, that we have that capacity for exploration within us.

what a gift! ... amiright?!?

happy new year!

well, i guess i'd better get off on the right foot with my blogging, since i'm now on a streak of 3 straight years where i've broken my previous annual posting record.

it'll be okay if i break my streak though. no pressure ...

i'm feeling like the way to have the best 2022 possible is to just be as chill as i can. go with the flow. take it easy. that kinda thing.

hopefully, i can manage it.

you too! (if you agree that sounds like a good strategy, i mean.)

do what it takes to find your joy, okay? sure seems like based on the last few years, it's not going to come looking for you. but that's no big deal, really -- life's actually always been that way, you know? happiness won't fall in your lap, but at the same time, if you don't sit down and take a load off from time to time, you won't have a lap for happiness to hang out in.

anyway, wishing everybody love and contentment in big ol' gobs this year!

xoxo,
claire