a characteristic i am soooo glad i don't have to worry about!

so, this guy i'm with! you all know who i'm talking about. yeah, yeah, i love him to death and all, but he's such a goofball about money. he makes a pretty good pile of it, but he's always fretting about spending it.

and i'm over here like, "so then don't?"

it's like the worst of both worlds. he worries about big ticket items that he wants or needs. so he doesn't get/do them. but then he keeps worrying! which means now he doesn't have the thing, but he's also still worrying about not being able to afford the thing. except if he really couldn't afford it, then he wouldn't be thinking about it at all unless it was in a "man, wouldn't it be cool if..." kind of way. so most everything he worries about paying for, he probably could pay for.

drives me kind of bonkers sometimes, and i have to tell myself, "claire, you have never earned or spend a single dime yourself in your whole life. maybe don't be so judgy, you know?"

and then i tell myself, "also, maybe thank your stars you don't have to worry about that stuff."

and then i write a blog post like this one and i end up thinking ...

"dude, for somebody who says she doesn't worry about this stuff, i sure did write a lot of words right there about worrying about this stuff."

radical political idea!

okay, so, like, why do we* have societies in the first place?

i mean, the easy answer is we evolved from a bunch of animals who lived and worked together because it gave them an advantage over other animals that wanted to chow down on the same grub or straight up eat us. but you could also dig into that a little deeper and say that the instinct for each one of those animals only developed because it was good for the animals as individuals to belong to a group.

and for sure, once we got smart enough, we could totally decide for ourselves whether to keep hanging out together or go our separate ways.

but we didn't.

(at least, most of us didn't. and the ones that did, didn't stick around.)

so why is that?

obviously, it's at least partly because we mostly kinda like each other. (i don't mean we all like all of each other, but overall, we get some kind of kick out of being part of a group to some extent or another or we just wouldn't put up with all the ways we're also really annoying.)

so why is it, if being part of a group is how we're born**, and also if we mostly kinda like each other, that some of us also get so steamy-ears pissed off about having to be in a group with people who are just a little bit different from us?***

sure, part of it is that some of those "just a little bit different" things are the same things that make us really annoying to each other. ("why do you always leave the freakin' toilet seat up?" "you know i can't stand that song ... do you have to keep humming it?" etc.) but annoyed and angry are actually pretty separate emotions. one of them can turn into the other over time, but you can be annoyed without being angry and you can be angry without being annoyed. and sometimes, it's actually ways that we're the same that make us annoyed or angry. ("can't you just admit you're wrong for once?" "can't you just admit you're wrong?")

so what's the specific deal with people not being able to stand people being different, when the fact is we're all different and it would be pretty ding-dong boring if we weren't?

my theory is: there are some people who don't actually like other people. they like the benefits that come from being in a society, but they have something missing that's there in all the rest of us, which is the part where we mostly kinda like each other.

and those people have learned that they can get more of the benefits they like if they encourage other people to not like each other.

so they work at convincing other people that things that are maybe just annoying, or maybe not annoying at all but just different, are worth getting hoppity-hop mad about.

if you can get somebody mad about something, and get them to feel like you're on their side about being mad over that thing, it's way easier to convince them to do stuff you want. and the madder you get them, the less brainergy they have to think about whether they actually ought to be mad, or to think about whether it makes sense for them to do the things you're telling them to do.

so here's my big idea.

why don't we all just make sure we're on the lookout for those people and call them on it when we see them trying to make us mad? and warn each other off of them when we recognize them? like, "hey, man, i think that dude's just trying to get us mad to take advantage of us."

because while there's lots of reasons for us to be annoyed at each other****, there are a lot fewer reasons for us to actually be mad.

99.9% of all our political problems would go away, i bet, if we just said, "whoa up there, pardner. how about if we just dial it back and remember that we all mostly kinda like each other here and see if we can't figure out a solution nobody needs to be pissed off about?"

anyway, if you agree, please spread the news.

there's way more of us who are mostly happy getting along with each other than there are of the people who don't actually like other people.

xoxo,
claire

(*and by "we" i guess i technically mean you non-doll people, since the reason i have a society is, i was deliberately made by one. but you know sometimes i kinda forget that and think, hey, i'm a person and you're all people, which makes us an us and means i get to say "we" about us even if, you know, i'm a little more literally a product of my society than you guys are.)

(**slash, popped out of the factory mold)

(***confession time: duh, i personally am way more than "just a little bit different" from a lot of folks, so maybe i'm not the best gal to be trying to ask or answer this question. but i'm the gal i am, so kinda i can't help it.)

(****i live with and love the dickens out of six other people, so trust me that i know what i'm talking about here!)

secret of the dragon emperor ... part 20!

wow, the big 2-0! criminy, since we've only wrapped two of the twelve adventures in the book, that means we're on a pace that will take 120 posts to cover the whole campaign. aannnd we've been playing for a little over six months, so, like, it might be two and a half more years before we're done?

well, the only way to see if we get there is one session at a time, i guess!

GM Elle: All right, everybody ready to go tonight? Did anyone pick up an exciting Heroic Ability after last week's session?
MSG: No new abilities for Dolora, so I'm definitely ready to get to it.
Claire: Master Spellcaster for Filvius! Now I can cast two spells in the same turn if I spend 3 WP. So in theory I could Lightning Flash and Heal Wounds one right after the other. Or Heal Wounds and Treat Wounds.
Ariel: What's "in theory" about that?
Claire: Well, Filvy isn't exactly a fountain of Willpower Points. If he casts two spells at power level 1, that's half his WP right there. And if he casts one at power level 2 and one at power level 3, he's pretty much done for the day. If I'm going to get much mileage out of the ability, I probably ought to take Focused for my next HA or two and rack up some more WP.
Hettie: Focused is unglamorous, but I suspect it will pay off in the long run.
Akane: Zedeja chose a miserly ability. Only 1 WP to use it ... Iron Fist! This adds 1d6 to unarmed attacking. With a Power Fist spell, this could result in 5d6 fist damage.
Hettie: Has Zedeja really thrown all that many punches, though? Aside from that injured cultist she beat up last session?
Akane: No. Very few brawlings for Zedeja. But preparedness is her watch-word!
GM Elle: So I think Filvius and Zedeja were the last two who hadn't earned a Heroic Ability already, right? I guess I can start throwing tougher monsters at you.
MSG: Sounds like the next Heroic Ability we all need to take is whatever boosts your run away! speed.
Claire: I don't think there is one.
GM Elle: Relax, I'm kidding. Mostly. At any rate, you've set up camp well short of your original goal, which was to reach the mysterious statue on the edge of the swamp before nightfall. Who's taking first watch?
Hettie: Dilfriida would actually like to request some healing before we get to the setting up watches stage. I'm down to just two hit points.
Akane: Two is sufficient for cowering and hiding in battles.
Hettie: Isn't Zedeja already asleep?
Akane: Oh! Yes, apologies, everyone. Although possibly even in her sleep she could criticize a halfling.
Hettie: I don't doubt it.
Claire: I roll a 12 on my Animism skill to cast Heal Wound, giving you 5 points back. I've got WP to spare at the moment, so I'll cast it again ... 7 is another success, for ... 13 more points.
Hettie: Far in excess of what I needed. Too bad you didn't roll that on the first casting. But thank you. Feeling much better, Dilfriida will volunteer for first watch so that she can hit the sack on second watch when presumably Zedeja might wake up.
MSG: Dolora is Exhausted and therefore probably grumpier than usual, so she'd just as soon take second watch.
Claire: Filvius is happy to be on the lookout for knowledge that might wander into camp while Dolora is sleeping.
Ariel: I'm already in bed!
Sasha: Guess that leaves Quackers to be the muscle on first watch.
GM Elle: All right, then. Glinssa, like Dilfriida, would just as soon be awake while Zedeja sleeps and vice versa. But midway through your watch,  the random encounter table decrees that a gang of orcs shows up, descending on your camp from all directions. You count 9 of the tough-looking nightkin, all equipped in leather armor and wielding scimitars. One of them levels her blade at Sir Q and demands to know what you're doing in this territory. With a glance in Glinssa's direction, she adds, "Is this another batch of cultists we need to dispatch?"
Sasha: Quackers yawns. "I mean, I think it's pretty obvious what we're doing here is camping. And I'm guessing we killed more cultists before breakfast this morning than you've dealt with all day."
Hettie: Dilfriida nervously puts a hand to her knife hilt, but stays quiet and lets the knight do the talking.
GM Elle: Glinssa takes a similar approach.
Claire: Not Filvius. He stands up excitedly and says, "Orcs! I've never met an orc -- I bet there are all kinds of things you could teach me about your people and customs!" I don't need to roll Beast Lore to recognize them, do I?
GM Elle: No, they fit the description you've heard repeatedly in your years, even if you haven't met one before. What you can do, though, is roll Persuasion to see if you convince them to start educating you about orcs.
Sasha: Don't roll a Demon, Claire, or I'm guessing Elle will be putting air quotes around "educating" real quick.
Claire: 13 fails, but hopefully not bad enough to offend them.
GM Elle: They look too suspicious to take offense. You see the leader give a curt head-nod to the others, causing them to close in a bit more.
MSG: Do the rest of us need to roll to see if we wake up?
GM Elle: Sure. But I'm giving Dolora a Bane for being Exhausted. Akane and Ariel can decide for themselves if their characters would be deep enough asleep to earn a Bane.
Ariel: Duh, obviously Fidu is. I roll an 8 and a 15, so I'm still ... oh, wait, my sheet says I've got Awareness 15 now, so I guess I wake up.
Akane: Zedeja sleeps a sleep of relief for undisclosed reasons. A 17 on one die prevents her from waking.
MSG: Two failures for Dolora. Her Awareness is only 8.
Ariel: I guess I'll sit up and listen and see if it sounds like I need to wake Dolora and Zed up.
Sasha: Quackers reaches for his backpack and says, "Look, guys, we don't want any trouble, but we're a pretty tough bunch." I pull out the cockatrice head and waggle it at them. "Ever seen one of these before? We eat them for snacks."
GM Elle: A cockatrice head is pretty hideous and evil-looking, but I'll have to roll Beast Lore for them to see if anyone recognizes it. Most of them don't, but I rolled two 2's and a Dragon. The first two throw an arm or a hand over their eyes, swearing or yelling, "Cockatrice!" at sight of it. The guy who rolled the Dragon realizes there's no need to be afraid of the head, but says to the leader, "Boss, if they killed that thing, they're plenty tough, all right." He says it in orcish, though, so I guess you should roll Languages to see if you understand.
Claire: Nope, 16. Dang, Filvius better up his Languages skill if he wants to gain knowledge from people who don't speak Common.
Ariel: Fidu rolls a 6, so he gets it.
Sasha: 17. I don't understand a word. 
Hettie: Hmm, a 4 actually makes it for Dilfriida.
GM Elle: Sash, I'll let you roll Performance if you're trying to use your nonchalance and bravado to intimidate them into backing off, or Persuasion if you're trying to trying to convince them with monster-head diplomacy.
Sasha: Bravado and nonchalance sounds good to me. I get a 4 against performance of 13.
GM Elle: A Dragon would have forced a morale roll, but any success gives them pause. The leader lowers her scimitar just slightly and asks where you intend to go and what your purpose is.
Claire: Filvius will immediately interrupt and say, "We're headed for that big statue just north of here! You don't happen to know anything about it, do you?"
Sasha: Quackers says, "Yeah, yeah. That's a stop we're making on our way back to Outskirt."
GM Elle: She lets her sword arm relax to her side, but doesn't sheathe her weapon. "Follow that course in the morning, then," she says. "But know that there will be trouble if you are speaking falsely." Then she gives a gesture and her band melts away into the darkness.
Claire: Filvius calls out, "Wait! You didn't say if you know anything about the statue!" If they don't come back or say anything in reply, he mutters, "Well, I guess I learned that orcs aren't very good at sharing information."
Ariel: Are things going to quiet down now? Because I really need to get my sleep.
GM Elle: The rest of the first watch passes without anything noteworthy happening.
MSG: Time for Dolora and Zedeja to take shift number two then, right?
Akane: Zedeja wakes with readiness.
GM Elle: In that case, let's see if anything happens on second shift. Looks like the dice say "no." Everyone wakes up in the morning fully refreshed and recuperated. Oops ... except that we never rolled for a severe injury for Dilfriida. We're supposed to do that anytime someone hits zero HP and survives. You need to make a CON check to avoid being badly hurt. This happened when you made that third Death Roll success back in the giant's cave.
Hettie: Wonderful. And one of my conditions was Sickly, so I get a Bane on the roll. 7 and 15. I'll go ahead and push the roll and say I was Exhausted by struggling my way out of near death. 6 and 13, so I succeed.
GM Elle: Okay, wavy screen effect to show that we're done with that flashback. You're all up the next morning and ready to go as the weak glow of sunrise struggles through the thick mists of the vale. What does the group do?
MSG: Keep heading back to Outskirt, I'd say.
Claire: With our promised pit-stop at the mysterious giant statue.
Ariel: I don't know about this statue thing. It seems like a lot of work from Fidu's point of view, since it's somewhere off the road we're not even sure how far. Also, you know, we didn't get one of those adventure cards about a giant statue.
Sasha: Yeah, but we also didn't get an adventure card about somebody nearly breaking their neck climbing down a giant's chimney so they could steal a book about carpentry, and you have to admit that was pretty entertaining.
Akane: Yes. Possibly Zedeja's emotions were mixed, but the heart of Akane feared deeply for the scoundrel halfling. Very exciting!
Hettie: Thank you. I'm glad it wasn't just me having fun.
GM Elle: Once you get on the road, it takes you about two more hours of travel before you spot something large and shadowy standing off in the mist, atop what looks like a hill. As you come alongside it, you see that it's definitely the same titanic statue you passed on the way to the farm, visible only from the waist up. The rest seems buried within the hill. Here's a picture that I commissioned from MSG and Akane. MSG did the background and Akane did the statue and the mist so nobody had the whole thing spoiled ahead of time.

MSG: Wow, that turned out really good. Way moodier than what I handed over to you.
GM Elle: I messed with the color settings until I thought it was hitting the right "Dragonbane" greens and greys.
Claire: Well, the final product is pretty dang kickass -- and I'm not just saying that because all the work that went into it means Filvius is a lot more likely to get his wish about exploring the thing.
Akane: Team work leads to many benefits.
Ariel: (That's what she said!)
GM Elle: Just to be completely honest, I'll confess that I hooked MSG and Akane into helping on this partly because I made up a dungeon for it after Filvius started fixating on the statue. I didn't want to have to railroad the party into exploring it if the other characters decided they'd just as soon ride on past.
MSG: Ah, so there's a whole dungeon to it -- not just a fancy map to use as an ambush spot?
Claire: Or it might be an ambush spot and the ambushers will end up dragging us to a dungeon somewhere else.
Ariel: I hope not! Fidu's going to get tired enough just leaving the road.
Sasha: Not sure if it looks like a likely spot for monsters, but I guess if we're reaching the thing early in the day, Quackers won't complain too much about making a stop.
Akane: Maybe not a spot for monsters, but an actual monster! There are golems in this game, yes?
Hettie: Good night, I hope there's not a golem that big. If there is, I don't think even Sir Quackenscrump would want to take it on.
GM Elle: So. There it stands, looming above the surrounding lands, a shadowy colossus shrouded in mists. What do you do?
MSG: What's the terrain and vegetation like here? Could we easily drive the cart all the way over to the hill? Or is there cover we could park it behind so that it's not just sitting beside the road with only Glinssa protecting it?
GM Elle: The area seems relatively level, other than the berm supporting the ruined road. But thanks to the mist, you can't see the quality of the ground more than a couple dozen yards out. Near the road, it looks okay, but it could turn muddy farther off. Definitely doesn't look like any substantial plants nearby -- mostly just grass and weeds. By the way, north is to the left on the map, not the top. 
Ariel: Okay, so just to make sure we don't drive our cart off into the mud for no reason, I'm going to use my Treasure Hunter ability to see where the greatest treasure is.
GM Elle: Your nose for loot definitely points you directly at the statue.
Ariel: Dang. Well ... but, it could be pointing me past the statue, right? It might be something miles and miles on the other side of it.
GM Elle: Possibly, but the statue is close and tall, and you kind of feel like your treasure sense is tugging your attention not just toward it, but also upward.
Ariel: Okay, okay. I guess Fidu is in.
Sasha: No sense waiting around anymore then, right? Let's get a move on. And somebody with good Bushcraft skill needs to be up front with me to notice if the ground starts getting mush.
MSG: Dolora's is pretty good.
GM Elle: Go ahead and make a roll.
MSG: Pff. 19.
Claire: Filvius isn't up front, but he'd still be looking around to see if the area has anything to it that he could use some knowledge about. Can I roll too?
GM Elle: Sure. Your first die will be for assessing the area overall. Then you'll get a Bane die, and if there's some kind of danger up ahead of Dolora and Sir Q, you'll need a success on both of those dice to spot it before they get there.
Claire: 10 succeeds for the base roll. And poopity-poop. The Bane roll is a Dragon, which means I succeed, but I also wasted a Dragon.
GM Elle: As it happens, there's no treacherous ground waiting to swallow anyone up. Filvius sees some stands of grass here and there that look like varieties that grow in and near swamps. But normal grass seems to dominate the area. Any particular spot you're going to head toward at the base of the hill?
MSG: I'd say we ought to park in that kind of shady area on the left. If it's shadowy there and the mists keep up, that will probably keep anyone on the road from spotting our cart. Well ... but on the other hand, does any part of the hill look easier or harder to climb up?
GM Elle: You can roll Bushcraft for the general lay of the land, and if you succeed you can Spot Hidden to see if you notice a particularly easy or tricky part of the slope.
MSG: Success on Bushcraft, failure on Spot Hidden.
GM Elle: So the whole thing looks pretty uniform in terms of the curvature of the slope. In fact, it seems uniform enough that you'd kind of guess it's a man-made structure, not just a natural hill. Or possibly a hill that was sculpted into regularity for some reason.
Claire: I also succeed on Bushcraft and fail on Spot Hidden, so I guess I know the same thing even if Dolora doesn't speak up about it. Aside from it looking so uniform, how steep is it? Like, walk-up steep or need-climbing-gear-steep?
GM Elle: In between. It will take an Acrobatics roll with a Boon to climb up the steepest part of the slope without a mishap, and if you do slip, you'll probably just roll back down, not break your neck.
MSG: I say we head on up, then.
Sasha: Quackers is for that too.
GM Elle: Everyone who's headed up make your rolls, then.
MSG: 6 and 10, both easy successes.
Claire: Oof. 10 and 11, but my Acrobatics is only 7, so I go tumbling back down.
Ariel: Mine's 7 too! But I roll 4 and 8, so I make it.
Sasha: The Bane from my Armor cancels the Boon, but I get a 5, so Quackers is fine.
Akane: Zedeja instructs our cultist to be very diligent with cart and donkeys while we are gone. "No sitting down this time!" The dice give her success in climbing.
Hettie: Dilfriida gets a 13 and a Demon, so I'm very grateful that was a Boon roll and not a Bane one.
GM Elle: All right, everyone gets up without too much trouble except Filvius. Claire, are you giving it another shot?
Claire: Well, on the one hand, Dolora's going to learning about whatever's up there all by herself if I don't go. But on the other hand, she's already getting there ahead of me, and meanwhile maybe there's something to learn about down here that I can find while she's up there. Plus, there might be an easier slope around back. I think I'll hike around the hill and see if there's anything to see.
GM Elle: All right. I'll have you make a roll or two in a bit, but everyone else will reach the statue and be able to examine it first. The group finds that the top of the hill is relatively level. At this elevation, the mists are considerably thinner, and you can see that the waist of the statue disappears directly into the ground -- there's no foundation or base in sight for it to be resting on. You can also tell that it's from some very ancient time, because the stone is deeply weathered and pitted, and one of the arms has broken and fallen to the ground along with the shield it holds.
MSG: Well, I guess we should get looking for secret doors into the thing.
Ariel: My Spot Hidden is pretty good! Should I roll?
Sasha: I say anybody and everybody ought to have a look.
Akane: Zedeja certainly does.
Hettie: Dilfriida as well.
GM Elle: All right, everyone who's searching can roll Spot Hidden.
MSG: 6 succeeds, surprisingly.
Ariel: I get a Dragon!
Sasha: 7 for Quackers. We're really Spotting us some Hidden out the wazoo.
Akane: Zedeja succeeds.
Hettie: And I roll a 12, exactly what I needed. I guess if there's a door, we find it.
GM Elle: No one finds anything except Fidu. Fidu is certain there's not a secret door anywhere around the waist of the statue. However, he does notice that in one area, there are a couple of climbing spikes sticking out of the stone higher up.
Ariel: Doh. I'll point them out, but no way am I trying to climb up to them.
Hettie: Dilfriida volunteers.
Akane: Zedeja says that climbing by a halfling can be permitted.
Hettie: How very generous of her.
Akane: But only to the spikes! There, you must tie a rope for others to climb up after!
Hettie: I'm not sure how much good that will do if the spikes don't continue all the way up.
GM Elle: From here, you can't really see. There is still some mist, and the surface of the statue is very rough.
Hettie: I roll a 10 against my Acrobatics of 17.
GM Elle: You make it to the first of the spikes, about 20 feet off the ground ... ah, 6 meters, I guess it should be. You're moving up along the rib cage of the statue, maybe a third of the way up. The mists have thinned even further, so you can make another Spot Hidden check to see if the spikes continue.
Hettie: Oof. That's a Demon.
GM Elle: If I roll odd, you lean too far out craning your neck and fall. Even, your eyes play some kind of trick on you. That's a 7, so you're going to take 3d6 falling damage, 2d6 with an Acrobatics check.
Hettie: My Acrobatics succeeds.
GM Elle: 7 points. And I just noticed that the falling rules say armor doesn't protect you in a fall, so you take the whole thing.
Hettie: Unpleasant. That's half my total hit points.
Akane: Zedeja rushes over, but stops when close enough to see the halfling is not dead. She gives a scowl and a finger shake. "Unacceptable! You should have tied the rope before falling!"
Hettie: Dilfriida gets up and throws the coil of rope at Zedeja, saying, "Why don't you climb up and do it, then?"
Akane: Because I have Levitate. Zedeja takes the rope and casts her spell. 12 succeeds, allowing her to reach the spike.
GM Elle: All right, you reach it and grab hold, but it will take an Acrobatics roll to tie the rope while hanging on.
Akane: 18 fails, which is Disheartening to Zedeja in her striving to demonstrate a competence superior to the thief. The roll is 4 when I push it this way.
GM Elle: You successfully tie the rope, then.
Akane: Good. Now, if 6 meters is one-third, is the top of the head 18 meters? Or is it the shoulder that is 18?
GM Elle: The head.
Akane: How far from this spike to the shoulder, then?
GM Elle: I'd say 7 or 8 meters.
Akane: Then Zedeja Levitates at Power Level 2 to the shoulder. 15 succeeds.
GM Elle: You reach the shoulder and find yourself high above the valley floor -- it's probably 35 meters to the base of the hill. You're able to look out across the land and see the peaks of the Kummer mountains looming up from the mists to the south, hazy, grey-green swamplands to the east, and forests to the north and west, with the road winding north and then veering west before getting swallowed up in the distance and shrouds of fog.
MSG: I guess Dolora will climb the rope and see if there are more spikes to use as a ladder above that.
GM Elle: You can roll Acrobatics with a Boon.
MSG: No problem.
Claire: Can Zedeja see Filvius from up there?
Akane: Zedeja is not looking for an elf. She is looking to make sure there are donkeys and a cart being watched with vigilance by a cultist.
GM Elle: Both Dolora and Zedeja can roll Spot Hidden.
MSG: I get a 2.
Akane: Zedeja successfully Spots with a 12.
GM Elle: Dolora is pretty sure the two spikes visible from the ground are the only ones anywhere near. There might be more up around the curve of the chest, but you don't see them.
MSG: So maybe whoever left these pulled their other ones out on the way back down.
Ariel: Or only got high enough to hammer in those two before they fell and cracked their head!
GM Elle: Meanwhile, Zedeja does see the cart, the donkeys, and Glinssa just where you expect them to be. Claire, Filvius has made it about halfway around the back side of the hill. Roll Spot Hidden to see if you notice anything about the hill.
Claire: Dragon!
GM Elle: Good job. Along the southeast flank of the hill, you see what looks like a large divot taken out of the bottom edge of the hill, a concave area in the grass that's around a meter, meter-and-a-half in diameter.
Claire: I'll go check it out.
GM Elle: Up close, you see that it looks like a very old entrance to a tunnel. There are timber braces half-buried in the earth and almost concealed by the surrounding grass. But the tunnel was either filled in long ago or collapsed -- there's only a shallow remnant of it within the braces, grassed over completely.
Claire: Okay, well ... I guess I'll poke around and see if I can find any concealed way in, like a hidden lever or something.
GM Elle: Go ahead and roll Spot Hidden.
Claire: Wowzers, another Dragon!
GM Elle: You don't find anything that looks like this is a workable way in. But you do manage to notice a rusty hunk of metal sticking up through the grass just to one side of the braces.
Claire: I'll examine it super closely for any sign of a trap. If I don't find anything, I'll see if I can pull it out.
GM Elle: It doesn't budge. It's a curved ridge of metal, maybe the size of your finger, and whatever it's part of is apparently buried under the soil the grass is growing from.
Claire: Okay, well ... I'm looking on my character sheet, and I literally have nothing to dig with. So I guess I'll just have to remember the spot and come back when I hook back up with everyone else.
GM Elle: Does that mean you're moving on around the hill, or heading back the way you came?
Claire: I mean, I might as well keep going at this point.
GM Elle: Back to the statue, then. What's everyone doing?
MSG: If I can climb up onto the first spike, I'll search around and see if I can find any secret doors in the surface of the statue.
Ariel: Fidu's got no business trying to climb up after anybody, and we already searched all around the statue, so I guess I'll just have a sit-down and relax.
Sasha: Quackers will go look around the broken-off arm with the shield.
Akane: Zedeja searches the shoulder and neck of this statue for secret ways in.
Hettie: Since our healer isn't around, Dilfriida will sit down with Fidu and do a Stretch Rest. Although I make sure I'm sitting at an angle where if Zedeja falls, I can watch.
Akane: She will not! But if she does, it's no problem. She has Slow Fall for a magic trick, remember?
Hettie: I do, but it's not as likely Dilfriida does.
GM Elle: MSG, roll Acrobatics and then if you make it, Spot Hidden. If Sir Quackenscrump is actively searching, Sash, you can also roll Spot Hidden on the arm, and Zedeja can do so up at the top of the statue. Spoiler warning, but Hettie, you can roll for your Stretch Rest.
MSG: Meaning nothing's likely going to happen for the next fifteen minutes, I guess. Well, I roll anyway. 13 on my Acrobatics is a success ... and 2 on my Spot Hidden succeeds too!
Ariel: I roll an 18 on my Be Lazy skill. That's a success for Fidu for sure.
Sasha: Quackers is just poking around, not really searching. 
Akane: The Spotting by Zedeja is 4.
Hettie: Dilfriida gets back 3 HP.
GM Elle: Nobody finds anything, I'm afraid.
Akane: In this case, Zedeja will Levitate atop the statue head. A success of 5.
GM Elle: You find yourself within the statue's crown. Unlike the rest of the statue, it's just rough, unfinished stone in this area. Apparently the sculptors figured whoever commissioned the statue would never see the very top. You can roll Spot Hidden if you want to search around in there.
Akane: Again, 4.
GM Elle: And again, you find nothing.
MSG: Well this seems like kind of a bust.
Claire: Not if it has arms and a waist.
Ariel: What?
Hettie: A sculpture terminology pun. Good one, Claire.
MSG: It took me a second, but now that I get it, I agree with Hettie.
Claire: That's a relief.
GM Elle: I'm going to start subtracting Advancement Marks here in a minute.
Akane: Zedeja finds this statue confounding! Can she climb down and possibly sit on the nose to examine its face?
GM Elle: With an Acrobatics check, sure.
Akane: 8 succeeds. Presumptuously, I roll Spot Hidden also, for a failure of 16.
GM Elle: That's okay, I wasn't going to make you roll. From your seat on the bridge of the nose, you see that the eyes are not actually stone, but curved metal screens. You can see that there's some sort of open area beyond them, but it's entirely dark, and you can't tell anything more than that about it.
Akane: Hmm. Does this screen appear sturdy? Or fragile?
GM Elle: You can make a Crafting check to evaluate that.
MSG: Now there's a skill we haven't used much.
Claire: My guess is no one put any points in it.
Akane: The roll is 17, very poor.
GM Elle: Then all you can really tell is that it seems to be intact despite obvious centuries of exposure.
Akane: Probably it's unwise to try breaking in this way, for many reasons. Zedeja attempts to climb back down. Her Acrobatics roll of 2 succeeds. Is more than one roll needed?
GM Elle: A total of three rolls if you climb back over to the shoulder and then down the chest to the spikes. Or, if you try to negotiate the climb from the chin to the throat and then down, one roll with a Bane and one normal roll.
MSG: Long story short, it's three dice being rolled either way.
Akane: Bah. So much effort feels undignified for an oldster such as Zedeja. She lets go and uses Slow Fall.
MSG: I climb back down too. My Acrobatics roll is 13 if I need one.
GM Elle: Everyone is back safe and sound on the hilltop, then. Claire, as Filvius continues circumnavigating the hill, you can roll Spot Hidden again.
Claire: 18 is a no go there.
GM Elle: You've rounded the southern end of the hill. Are you going to continue all the way around?
Claire: Um ... I was, but that sure sounds like a loaded question following right after me blowing a Spot Hidden check. Filvius doesn't know he failed anything, though, so I guess I keep going.
GM Elle: Make an Awareness roll.
MSG: This doesn't sound good.
Claire: Neither is my Awareness ... I only have an 8. And I roll a 17. I'd think about pushing it, but honestly, I can't come up with any reason for Filv getting any of the Conditions from this situation. As far as he knows, he's headed back to where he last saw everybody else with news about an old caved-in tunnel and some metal thing in the ground.
GM Elle: You'll go last in the initiative order, then.
Ariel: That sounds even less good!
GM Elle: As you're passing by an area of kind of matted grass, a seam pops open around the edge, and a giant trapdoor spider lunges out to attack you.
Claire: Eep.
GM Elle: On the first of its two turns, it jabs you with its poison sting. Are you going to use up your turn to Evade?
Claire: One hundred percent. I roll an 11, which succeeds.
GM Elle: The spider lunges at you, ripping and tearing with its forward legs. 5 points of damage, and time for us to draw initiative. Do you want to draw before or after the spider?
Ariel: I don't think I can stand the suspense if you wait till after!
Claire: Me either. Where's the deck? Okay, I draw ... yep. Par for the course, it's the 8.
Sasha: Well, nice knowing you, Filv.
GM Elle: The spider draws 3 and then 2.
Claire: Seriously? So if I'd waited, it would have gotten the 8 and the 3 and I'd go on 2.
Hettie: Should have gone for the suspense.
GM Elle: The spider spits a sticky web at you. Roll Evade or you're stuck. This isn't an action, so it won't use your turn.
Claire: Whew, that's a relief. I get a 10.
GM Elle: Second turn for the spider is Mesmerizing Eyes. You have to roll a WIL save or suffer a Fear attack.
Claire: Fudge. I roll a Demon.
GM Elle: You turn white as a sheet and become Scared. Because of the Demon, I'm also giving you a second Condition. I'll let you pick.
Claire: Yeah, that's super-easy. Disheartened. That's practically a freebie for Filvius because he pretty much never uses any Charisma based skills.
GM Elle: Your turn, then.
Claire: Power Level 3 Lightning Flash, and boy I'd better roll this. Nope, 19, so I'd better push it. Let's say I'm trying so hard to cast it that I become Exhausted. This time I roll a 4. Krackow! 4d6 of damage. Foo. That's only 13.
GM Elle: It's still up ... and you're within 2 meters of it, so you take the secondary damage.
Claire: Oops. What the -- my 4d4 come up 13 too. I'm at zero HP.
Ariel: Wow. That was terrible luck.
GM Elle: It's a new round. Since everybody saw the lightning bolt streak out of the sky and heard the boom, you can all draw initiative.
MSG: 8.
Claire: 7.
Ariel: 1!
Sasha: 9 for Quackers.
Akane: Zedeja has initiative of 3.
Hettie: And ... 2 for Dilfriida.
GM Elle: Spider goes on 4 and 5. You're up, Fidu.
Ariel: Oh boy, now what do I do? If I move my full amount, can I get to where I can see the spider?
GM Elle: Yes, but you're just barely out of range for your bow, so you'll get a Bane on the attack.
Ariel: Might as well at least try ... nope, 3 and 13.
GM Elle: Dilfriida?
Hettie: I believe I shall trade cards with Dolora.
MSG: Sweet. I'll move as far as I can and then blow my horn to give all allies a Boon to rolls until my next turn. Akane is next, right?
Akane: Zedeja is too far to reach sight for slinging, I think. I will trade my card to our duck knight.
Sasha: Awesome. If I move to here, can I get a shot with my bow?
GM Elle: I'll let you.
Sasha: You're the best, Elle. 15 is exactly what I need. My damage is --
GM Elle: The spider dodges with a 2.
Sasha: Damn it.
Hettie: You did at least use up one of its turns.
GM Elle: And now it gets its second one. Ramming attack! The spider launches its massive body at a player character with a great leap. Sadly, the only person within range is Filvius. The damage means you get an automatic Death Roll failure. And it's your turn.
Claire: Peachy. First up I guess I have to make an actual Death Roll ... with a boon! But I get a 13 and an 18. I'm going to say the pain makes me Dazed and push the roll. This time I make it. For my action, I don't think I have any choice except to try to Rally ... yeah, this is super likely. It's a WIL roll with a Bane, but I'm scared so it's a double Bane. Oh, but Dolora's beautiful horn tune cancels the second Bane. I still blow it with a 13 and an 18.
Hettie: Dilfriida's on initiative 8. She'll move up and fire her bow with a boon ... nice, a 15 and a Dragon. So that's an extra d10 ... I roll 13 points. Seems to be sort of a theme with our damage this session.
GM Elle: It's looking pretty hurt but is still up. Akane, Zedeja's the last to go.
Akane: It's a dash for her. Only two movements.
GM Elle: New initiative, then.
MSG: 6.
Claire: 9.
Ariel: Poopier than last time. 7.
Sasha: Quackers is on 5.
Akane: Zedeja gets the 2.
Hettie: Dead last with 10.
GM Elle: The spider is on 4 and 8. Akane, it's your turn.
Akane: Zedeja moves closer to sling. This has a Boon from a bard ... therefore a hit from rolls of 9 and 18. 
GM Elle: Spider attempts to dodge ... and succeeds with a 3. Sir Quackenscrump is next.
MSG: Wait, the spider used its card 4 turn to dodge, not the 8?
GM Elle: Possibly it's not very strategic. Or possibly it's really hurt and wants to be able to dodge again if it has to.
Sasha: Well, it's going to have to, because here comes Quackers with his bow. 14 and 15, definite hit. 
GM Elle: The spider tries another dodge. Ooh, 17 blows it.
Sasha: Yes! I'm spending the WP to do my Dragonslayer ability for a total of 11 points of damage.
GM Elle: It's dead.
MSG: Nice. Dolora moves closer to Filvius and blows her horn again.
Ariel: Fidu's going to dash to get down to Filvius and maybe try to heal him or do that Rally thing next round.
GM Elle: Claire, you're up.
Claire: Failure on my Death Save. Wait, I have the horn Boon ... but still fail. Trying to Rally ... nope, 2 an 13.
Ariel: Dang.
Hettie: Dilfriida's last, I think. She just moves up to maybe hand off her one bandage if someone needs it to heal Filvius.
GM Elle: New round. Rather than draw initiative, you can just go in whatever order you like.
Akane: Zedeja must be first due to her Healing skill. Luckily, she has a bandage she can use.
Hettie: Well, we may need to draw cards after all, because if Zedeja insists on going first, she'll find out that she doesn't have that bandage after all, because I stole it from her.
GM Elle: Let's cut to the chase and just have Zedeja draw. If she doesn't get the 1, someone else can trade with Dilfriida and let her arrive on scene waving her bandage.
Akane: Initiative for Zedeja is 6.
Hettie: Okay, Dilfriida moves up and has her bandage out.
Akane: Someone must trade with Zedeja, then. Let's assume it, and she has a horny Boon. Rolls are 15 and Dragon!
GM Elle: You can roll 2 dice for healing instead of 1, then.
Akane: Poor. Even with 2 dice, it's only 4 points.
Claire: That's plenty. I'll immediately try to cast Heal Wound on myself. Double 7's means I succeed, getting back another 5.
Ariel: That was a close one!
Sasha: Quackers thanks Filvius for luring the spider out so I could kill it.
Claire: Filvius says, "You're welcome, but don't expect that to happen again anytime soon!"
Akane: Zedeja demands information from the elf. "What have you learned, sneaking around to anger spiders?"
Claire: Filvius says, "What have you learned, climbing up the hill and poking around the statue?"
Ariel: How about if we just trade information so everybody knows everything? Fidu is happy to give Filvius some scoop if Filvius agrees.
Akane: Only Zedeja knows about looking into gigantic statue eyes! That information is not available for a hound to trade.
Sasha: While you guys are arguing, Sir Quackenscrump is going to heave open this spider's trap door and see if there are any more of them to kill down there. Do I need to make a Strength roll?
GM Elle: It's mostly spider silk with grass and some dirt stuck to it to disguise it, so you don't have any trouble wrestling it open. A tunnel mouth lies beneath it, full of gloom and shadows and the musty smell of spiderwebs. The way slopes steeply down into the earth.
Ariel: Well, if there's going to be arguing up here and Sir Q wants to explore down there, Fidu will offer to light his lamp and go in too.
Sasha: Thanks. How about Dolora and Dilfriida? You guys coming, or would you rather stay in the ringside seats for a mage-on-mage argument?
Akane: Zedeja commands everyone to wait! It's unwise to climb into a burrow without knowing all possible facts.
Hettie: I'm going with Sir Q and Fidu.
MSG: Me too.
Claire: Filvius certainly doesn't want to get left behind, then. He'll come too. Zedeja can stay and argue by herself if she wants to.
Akane: This disobedience -- so disrespectful of your elder party member! Zedeja will go as well, but fuming.
GM Elle: All right, then. After scrambling down a brief incline, you find yourself in an earthen chamber lined with soft webbing. Boulders and earth and other indistinct objects form a nest to one side, layered over with still more spider silk. Two other tunnels meet at the entrance to the chamber, which looks like this:

MSG: How about if we carefully go over and search that nest.
Sasha: I'm ready to hack any giant spider eggs to bits before they can hatch all over us.
GM Elle: You find two treasure cards worth of loot in the nest, amongst the bones of some unfortunate souls who previously fell prey to the spider. Here's the treasure deck for you to draw from. 
MSG: Super. A poison dagger, and I have to roll Evade or get stuck. 3 is an easy success, though. Do I roll this poison type it talks about, or is that a secret?
GM Elle: Somebody could make a Healing check to see if they can figure out the poison type.
Claire: Sure, I'm game to go for that knowledge. I get a 3 also.

GM Elle: Then the dice say it's sleeping poison, potency 12.
Hettie: I believe that's the same kind I found on that dagger from the bandit cave way back at the start of the campaign.
GM Elle: Maybe the Misty Vale is just lousy with soft-hearted poisoners. At any rate, what's the second card?
MSG: A bottle. It says a Healing check reveals the contents or else the GM rolls in secret. Dolora will try the check herself this time. Nope, 18 fails. Guess you have to roll, Elle.
Claire: You're just trying to keep Filvius from getting ahead of you in knowledge, aren't you?
MSG: No, Dolora is just itching to get some knowledge for herself. She doesn't know that failing the roll means the GM keeps things secret.
Claire: I guess not.
GM Elle: The result is rolled and noted. So what are you going to do next?
MSG: Hand the dagger over to Dilfriida, for one thing. Unless someone else is good with knives.
Ariel: Fidu's pretty good with them! But keeping track of which one is poisoned sounds like a lot of work.
Hettie: Dilfriida will certainly take it if no one else is inclined to do so.
GM Elle: And then?
MSG: Well, if we came down through this bottom tunnel, then the top one doesn't point as directly toward the statue as the other one. I vote for the one that goes to the left.
Claire: I'm sure the spider was highly motivated to give us the most direct path to wherever we're headed.
Ariel: I could use my treasure hunting ability! Which one does it tell me leads to the greatest treasure?
GM Elle: Your nose for loot is more drawn to the path at the top there than the one on the left.
Ariel: I tell everybody that's where we should go, then.
Akane: Zedeja supports this suggestion of our hound. Now it is a requirement, not just opinion!
Hettie: Dilfriida will overlook Zedeja's bossiness since it was Fidu's idea to start with.
MSG: Want to lead us in that direction then, Sir Quackenscrump?
Sasha: Darn tootin!
GM Elle: It's a steep scramble up through the narrow, earthy tunnel. You'll need to make an Acrobatics check if you don't put away your sword and shield.
Sasha: Acrobatics is practically my middle name, and I'm not keen to put either one away. My plate armor gives me a Bane, but I still make it with an 8 and another 8.
Ariel: We should start calling you Sir Quackrobatics!
Sasha: Mmmm ... no.
Ariel: Well my Acrobatics is terrible, so I guess I have to hand my lamp over to somebody while I climb.
Akane: It should be handed to the duck knight! What good for him to be ready with sword and shield and have no light?
Sasha: Damn it. That's actually a good point. All right, I put my shield to one side and reach down left-handed for the lamp. But if I get hold of it without anything jumping on my back, I'm going to set it right down next to the hole and gear back up.
GM Elle: You don't have any difficulty doing that. Does everyone else follow suit and use both hands to climb?
MSG: Acrobatics is my best score, so I'm not putting my club down. Agh. I get a demon.
GM Elle: Not only do you fall, but you fall right on your club. Roll a die. Odd means you take club damage, even means your club breaks and won't be usable until you can repair it.
MSG: Awesome. I roll a 6, so I wreck my best weapon.
Claire: On the bright side, now you don't have to worry about having it out while you climb up.
GM Elle: Once everyone is up, then, you find yourselves in a rough-hewn earthen passageway with a low ceiling of wood beams held up by massive wood braces every few meters. The walls look like a mixture of earth and heaped boulders. Here's what you can see with the light from Fidu's lamp.

GM Elle: Interestingly, on the outer side of the passageway a decrepit picket fence runs along the lower part of the wall. It doesn't look at all like the heavy wooden buttresses and beams that the tunnel is constructed of.
MSG: I'm going to examine it closely and see if I can get any kind of knowledge off of it.
GM Elle: Make a Crafting roll to see if you can figure out anything about its purpose or construction.
MSG: Nope. I get an 11 against my skill level of 7.
Sasha: Let's get a move on, if somebody's picked up the lamp.
Ariel: I've got it!
GM Elle: Typical marching order of Sir Q, Dolora, Fidu, Filvius, Zedeja, Dilfriida?
MSG: Works for me.
Sasha: Quackers isn't waiting for everybody to get organized behind him. Fidu's got the light up, so I'm moving down the tunnel. What do we see?
GM Elle: The next stretch looks like this. There's a branch to your right that looks like it leads deeper into the mound, and the way straight ahead looks like a dead end, although it's pretty shadowy because the lamplight doesn't really reach that far. Anybody who wants to shift that marching order speak up.

Sasha: I say, "Hey! Any monsters down that dead end? No?" If it stays quiet, Quackers takes the right turn.
MSG: Following.
Ariel: Me too!
Claire: Well, Filvius wants to see if there's anything worth knowing about down this dead end, so I'll use my Light magic trick to ... whoa, I never did a Stretch Rest after that spider fight! Anybody want to pause and let the party healer get back some WP? I definitely don't want to spend one out of my last four powering up a magic trick light.
Ariel: I think we're already around the corner.
Sasha: Just waiting for the GM to map out the next stretch of tunnel, in fact.
Akane: Zedeja insists on a rest for the junior mage. All must stop! It's unwise to proceed with a feeble healer. Also, the senior mage has also used much magical energy that could be replenished.
Hettie: Nobody told you to go floating around to the top of that statue head.
Akane: Of course not. It is not for others to tell Zedeja of Mind what to do. She is the teller -- others must be heedful!
GM Elle: Well, others? Are you being heedful?
MSG: If I hear that people need to rest, I'd probably dourly agree to stop for a bit.
Sasha: Not me. Come on, Houndy, let's see what's up ahead.
Akane: Also unwise is to divide the party!
Hettie: Since it seems they've already left us behind, Dilfriida will get out her oil lamp and light it.
Claire: With more light, are we able to see down that dead end?
GM Elle: Only if you go closer.
MSG: Parking in the middle of an intersection feels like it's not the best strategy to me. Dolora will check out the dead end if Dilfriida follows with the light.
Claire: No way is Filvius letting Dolora do all the learning about whatever's down there, though. I go too.
Akane: Zedeja prefers not to wait alone in the dark, so also accompanies the rest.
GM Elle: It definitely reaches a dead end. There are a lot of beams there. Maybe those and the wall to your right are load-bearing. You can't see any other purpose for this area.
MSG: I mean, I didn't see any purpose for anything inside this hill yet, so ...
Claire: If it's safe-ish seeming here, Filv will sit down and use his elvish Inner Peace to get the most out of his Stretch Rest.
GM Elle: Don't roll just yet. If Sir Quackenscrump and Fidu run into something, you might be interrupted.
Claire: Not once I'm Inner Peacing it up, I won't be. I pretty much go into a coma.
Sasha: The duck and dog'll take care of whatever they come across, don't worry. So what do we find?

GM Elle: You find that the bend you took curves parallel to the tunnel you were just end, then reaches a wider space ahead. Occupying the space, with barely any room between its roof and the beamed ceiling, is what looks like a garden shed.

Ariel: Wait. Are you saying there's a shed with a guard in it, or an actual, like, shed from a garden.
Sasha: Or a shed that's being used as a den by a bunch of gars.
Akane: Guard in, I understand. But what are gars?
Hettie: It's a kind of very large, mean fish.
Akane: Ah. So, much less likely than a guard in a shed.
Hettie: Yes. Although I'm pretty sure Elle said "garden shed," and that seems a bit implausible to find beneath a hill as well.
GM Elle: Yeah, so, I meant it was similar to a garden shed. But give me a second here to make a note to myself that I should never introduce gargoyles in this campaign, in case someone asks me if I mean a gar-girl or just a gargle.
Ariel: Gosh, I didn't think my question about if the shed had a guard in it was completely dumb or anything.
Sasha: I take the blame for getting us off-topic with my gar joke.
Akane: Elle, be sure to add to your note the danger of someone thinking "gargoyles" is actually "gar gills."
GM Elle: I should never have mentioned it. Look, whatever the shed-like structure actually is, tell me what Sir Quackenscrump and Fidu do when they see it.
Ariel: I'm pretty much just holding out the light so Quackers can see it.
Sasha: I'm going to call out, "Hey! Any monsters in there?" Is the door open or shut, by the way?
GM Elle: About half-open. You don't hear any response to your question.
Sasha: I'll get a little closer and tap on the door with my sword. Then I'll say, "If there are monsters in there, don't think you'll be able to hide from us!"
GM Elle: A moment later, the fan end of a rake sticks out at about chest level. I guess I should say something more like, "extends," because it's not stabbing out quickly or anything like that. When it gets far enough out, you see that there is a word written on the fan of tines, in some kind of thin, white substance. It says, "NO."
Ariel: Does ... the white stuff look like spiderweb?
GM Elle: You can roll Beast Lore with a Boon to see.
Ariel: Ooh, 4 and 15. The 4 makes it.
GM Elle: It definitely has the look of spider silk.
Ariel: Okay, so some spidery thing in there is telling us "no"? Does it mean no, there are no monsters, or no, it doesn't think it can hide from us?
Sasha: Or it's a monster that just likes to argue, so it says "no" to everything. 
Akane: Or possibly, it means for you to leave. No rake equals leaves for sure, right?
GM Elle: The rake withdraws back inside. What do you do?
Ariel: I'm going to say, "Hey, do you mean there are no monsters in there?" Then when I see it's answer, I'm going to use my Insight to see if it's lying.
GM Elle: After a brief pause, the rake comes back out with the word "yes" on it.
Ariel: All right, here go two Willpower Points. Is it telling the truth?
GM Elle: You feel like it is.
Ariel: I tell Sir Q it's telling the truth, so there's no monsters in there.
Sasha: Well, number one, I don't know that Quackers has that much faith in your ability to know when people are lying. He's got no clue there's a Heroic Ability and you're spending Willpower Points and it's reliable. And number two, who says monsters think they're monsters?
Hettie: While a good point, that seems rather a bit philosophical and/or empathic for our good duck knight.
Sasha: Eh. Number three is more important anyway: I really want there to be a monster so I can go in and kill it. Or have it come out here where I can kill it. I challenge it to show its face and prove it's not a monster.
GM Elle: The rake is pulled back in. You think you hear some motion from inside, and then a scratching noise of some sort. After a bit of that, something flies out through the door and thumps to the earthen floor of the chamber. It looks like one of the pickets from the picket fence, except it doesn't have the peeling remnants of paint on it. Roll Spot Hidden.
Ariel: 17, bleh.
Sasha: 2!
GM Elle: As the wooden plank tumbles through the air, you think you see something scratched on one side of it. But when it lands, the side facing up is blank.
Sasha: I tell Fidu I think there's something on the down side.
Ariel: Is it a pretty good distance from the door? I don't want to go over there and pick it up if something could reach out from inside and grab me.
GM Elle: It's probably a couple of meters from the door.
Ariel: Okay, I'll try turning it over with my dagger. I don't want to touch it myself in case it's covered with sticky spider goo to glue my hands to it.
GM Elle: You get it turned over without too much trouble. There are some word scratched there, in surprisingly well-formed letters. They say, "Alone here. My home. Today is yesterday's future, which I wove. No trouble between us."
Sasha: What the hell is that supposed to mean?
Ariel: I don't know, but I guess I'll spend two more WP to see if it's the truth.
GM Elle: Far as you can tell, it's being straight with you.
Ariel: I guess I'll ask if it has any useful information it might want to trade with us about what else is down here.
Sasha: Yeah, especially directions to any monsters.
GM Elle: The rake extends out from the gap again, like it's reaching for the picket. It's not long enough to go that far, though.
Ariel: Um, I'll scoot it closer with my boot.
GM Elle: The rake catches hold and drags it back in. You hear more scratching.
Ariel: I hope it's scratching out a deal I can use my Bartering on.
Sasha: I'm totally not convinced yet that it isn't a monster.
GM Elle: The picket is tossed back out after a bit. More words have been added: "A weaving for magic. Have you any?"
Ariel: I say we have a couple of mages if it needs a spell cast for it.
Sasha: Or if it's got something really good to offer, there's at least one of the mages we'd probably make a swap for.
Akane: This comment ... so unnecessary!
Sasha: If Zedeja ever finds out about it, Quackenscrump's excuse is that he's trying to trick this thing into acting monstrous.
GM Elle: For the moment, nothing seems to happen in response to those suggestions.
Ariel: I guess we should wait a while to be polite? Oh! I push the wood thing back over closer to the door again.
GM Elle: The rake retrieves it and there's more scratching. This time it says, "No spells. For a weaving, permanent magic."
Ariel: Jeepers. Do we even have any magic that's permanent?
Sasha: The elf has that creepy bone mask. Not sure he'll want to trade it for some spider knitting or whatever it's talking about.
Ariel: Duh, he will! I asked it if it had information to trade, so it must mean whatever it's weaving will have information, and we all know what a sucker Filvius is for getting more info.
Sasha: True.
Ariel: I guess I'll tell it we need to go back and talk to our pals and see if anyone wants to trade magic stuff for this weaving. Oh, and I guess I'll tell it my name's Fidu and this is Sir Quackenscrump. And I'll push the wood back toward the door.
GM Elle: It retrieves it again and does some more scratching. When the board comes back out, it says, "Windsilk of Five Far Eyes."
Ariel: Is that its name? Or is that something it's saying it wants to trade for? I don't get it. I guess I'll tell it we'll be back. Are you ready to go see what's taking everybody else, Sir Quackenscrump?
Sasha: Sure. Maybe they got hung up fighting a monster instead of getting stuck with a talking rake and fencepost.
GM Elle: All right, everybody who is doing a Stretch Rest at the dead end can roll it, and then I think this is a good place to stop for the night. Experience questions ... everybody gets participation. Explore a new location? Check. Defeat one or more dangerous adversaries? Spider, check. Overcome an obstacle without using force? Sure, those orcs could have been trouble if you hadn't smooth-talked them. That leaves giving in to your weakness.
MSG: I can't think of anything that qualifies for Dolora.
Claire: Filvius came pretty close to getting himself killed searching the perimeter of the hill for knowledge. I'd say that counts.
Ariel: I woke up when the orcs were at our camp but I was too lazy to leave the tent, so I think that's pretty slothful of me.
Sasha: Monsters, monsters, monsters.
Akane: Similarly, much bossiness from Zedeja.
Hettie: I don't feel like I was particularly thin-skinned tonight, so I'm not counting that one.
GM Elle: Then everybody mark your advancement marks, make your rolls, and we'll see how things go next time!
MSG: Nice game, Elle.
Ariel: Yeah! Super-cool you came up with this dungeon all by yourself instead of using the book.
GM Elle: Thanks, glad everyone is liking it.

tune in next time and we'll see if we figure this giant statue out! (or if we spend the whole session throwing a board back and forth to talk to whatever's in this shed ...)

the things i put up with!

now, i hope everybody knows that i wouldn't trade my boyfriend (or any of my other yams, for that matter) for anything or anyone in the world. we're pretty much as close as two people can possibly be (if not closer!) ... but the downside of that is that sometimes his little quirks and foibles rub off on me. aaaannnd some of his neuroses, too.

which is fine, really, since to start with i'm one of the chillest chicas you could ask for, so even a smidge of bad-influence neurosis still leaves me waaay more cool-as-a-cucumber-y than msg. mostly, it's kind of funny when i find myself worrying over something he would worry over that i normally wouldn't.

as long as i don't start going batso-crazy over an out-of-place comma or something, who cares, right?

but then the thing is, there's this neurosisynergy thing that happens every once in a while. it's where he's being a bad influence on me and i notice i'm being neurotic, and instead of laughing it off, i think, oh, cheez-itz, i better not let him realize he's being a bad influence or he'll feel bad about it! but of course, i only ever notice this when it's too late, and so when i start trying to exude the usual deluge of cool, i flub it just enough for him to notice. and then he starts worrying that something's wrong. but he knows that usually there's pretty much never anything wrong for me because my life rules. so he tells himself he's being paranoid. and then i notice that he's acting weird trying not to make a big deal out of something he knows can't be a big deal because if there was a big deal thing going on, he can totally bet his ass i would tell him so. but now i've noticed that he's noticed that something's off, and not only am i worried he'll find out i was succumbing* to his bad influence, i'm also embarrassed that i let him notice. plus, i'm also annoyed at myself for letting my chill go to nil. all of which means i end up doubling down and acting extra-positive instead of just spilling the beans. and that leads to him getting extra sure something is really wrong or why would i be wallowing in marshmallow-happy-sappy overcompensation?

if we're really lucky, one of our other yams will kind of look at us both and say, "you two ... do know you're doing that thing again, don't you?"

which can be pretty humiliating and get us both really red in the face, but at least breaks the spiral of neuroticism.

anyway, that's way too long of a long way of saying that this exact thing happened yesterday, except that everyone remained clueless (or pretended to really well) right up until the point where they're going to read this post and say, "aha! so that's why they've been acting so wacky!"

and we're both going to get teased mercilessly because that's how it happens around here.

but you know ... it's the price you pay for living a dream life, right?

xoxo,
claire

(*there is not nearly a big enough deal made out of how nasty this word ought to be. i mean, just pay attention to those first two syllables. they're just begging to be made a double entendre out of. i'm not wrong, am i?)

secret of the dragon emperor ... part 19!

here's part two of our latest dragonbane session!

GM Elle: So by the time you pack the tent up and go back down the mountain to Blind Hildi's Farm, it's getting to be mid-morning.

MSG: Meaning not all that long since we had breakfast.

Sasha: If you're implying you don't want to stop for that home-cooked meal I self-invited us to, Quackers is going to stop you right there.

MSG: Not at all. Dolora will be happy to learn more about farm life in this region.

Claire: Filvius too. It may be mundane knowledge, but knowledge is knowledge, and Filvy craves it just as much as Dolora. Maybe more.
Ariel: Fidu is ready to rest from the trip down the mountain, for sure.
Sasha: Hard work riding in a cart for an hour, huh?
Ariel: Is there any other kind of work?
GM Elle: When you arrive at the farm, Hildi overflows with gratitude for the return of her niece, and is more than happy to cook you a meal. Anybody who wants to can consider this their stretch rest for the shift.
MSG: Deal! In addition to that, I'll ask lots of questions about what it is she's cooking.
Claire: I'll ask lots of questions about what her tricks are for running a farm when she can't see.
Hettie: Possibly a little insensitive there, Clarity.
Claire: Hey, the elf has an 8 charisma and is starved for any kind of learning he can get.
GM Elle: This is also a medieval setting, so there's not much likelihood Hildi expects people to politely skirt around her visual disability. She's actually quite proud of the various knacks she's worked out over the years to do things sighted people wouldn't expect her to be able to do. At the end of all the cooking and questioning and eating, she thanks you again and offers you two days of rations each to take along with you, since she has nothing else to offer for the great service you've done.
MSG: I mean, has she completely exhausted all the knowledge of farm life she could give us? Seems like that would take a lot longer than however long she spent cooking the food and serving it to us. Dolora is more than happy to keep learning.
Claire: Filvius is too, but I suspect our other party members will make an issue of it. Also, he's champing at the bit to go back to that huge statue we passed on the way here and investigate it. It's only half a day back along the road, so we should be able make it by nightfall if we leave after lunch.
Ariel: Fidu isn't all that eager to go exploring a ruined old statue that's way off from the road.
Sasha: I thought Elle said we couldn't tell exactly how far off it was because of the mists.
Ariel: Well obviously it was far enough away that the mists made it hard to see! That's got to be a hike.
Akane: Zedeja agrees it's useless to bother with a broken old relic.
Hettie: Dilfriida mutters that she feels exactly the same way sometimes.
Akane: What? Speak up, halfling!
Hettie: I don't particularly want to go on a wild goose chase at an ancient statue that people have probably been digging around at for years. But I also don't want to agree with Zedeja. On the other hand, maybe the best way for Zedeja to not get her way would be for Dilfriida to agree with her so she'll change her mind to avoid doing what the halfling wants. I guess I'll speak up a little louder and say, "We should just get back to town and cash in the stuff we got from this trip." It's not really a bluff, because she does think that, even if she'd be happy to needle Zedeja into changing her tune.
Akane: Zedeja is tuneless. It's our bard who is changeable. There's no tricking this mage into plan switching. Also, the best solution to a halfling stating opinions is always to ignore them.
Hettie: Well, I tried.
GM Elle: Before you reach the statue site, unfortunately, the road takes you near a high, craggy hill with enormous boulders heaped at its base. As you're approaching it, a bellowing roar splits the air, and from around the boulders comes charging the figure of a furious giant. You have about two rounds before he gets to you, it looks like.
MSG: And how big is this giant, exactly? Does he have out a weapon?
Claire: Also, can I check Beast Lore to see what I know about giants?
GM Elle: A giant is Huge. In game terms, that means it can block an 8 meter by 8 meter area, which is 4 times as wide as the area a human can block. So he's probably also about 8 meters tall, or 24-ish feet to all of our non-metric players. This one doesn't seem to have a weapon out, but his enormous, clenched fists make you think he probably doesn't need one against tiny things like you. Anyone who wants to rack their brains for the first round can make a Beast Lore roll to see what they know.
MSG: I'm also using my eyes to figure out if he looks like he can outrun us and/or our donkeys. My Beast Lore roll is 3, which succeeds.
Claire: Mine's 13, also a success.
Ariel: I'm gonna say this situation is worth putting a little effort into, so Fidu hops down from the wagon and runs to get farther away from the giant. I'll get my bow out too, in case we end up fighting him.
Sasha: Quackers hauls out the cockatrice head and says, "Hey, buddy, we're big-time monster-slayers, so back off and let us go on our way if you don't want to get monster-slain."
Akane: Zedeja assumes this giant is faster than an oldster mage. She casts Stone Skin for defense at the highest power level. The roll is 8, success.
Hettie: If there are lots of boulders around here, Dilfriida will hop off the cart and hide behind one.
GM Elle: Okay. Dolora and Filvius both recall that giants are very territorial and don't tolerate people intruding on their lands. You also know their long legs give them a faster movement speed than people of your size. It's unlikely any of you except maybe Fidu could outrun him if you stay to the open road, but if you split up and make Evade checks, you can probably scatter into the hills before he gets to you. Sash, you can make a Persuasion roll for Sir Q, and Dilfriida can make a Sneaking attempt, Hettie -- with a boon, because this sort of giant is a bit short-sighted.
Sasha: 19 is almost as fail-y as you can get, but Quackers will get mad if the giant doesn't respect a cockatrice-killer, so I'm pushing the roll. Dammit, 18. So now I'm Angry and didn't get anything out of it.
Akane: Possibly good for the party, however. Now the duck knight is a tempting target for the aggravation of this giant.
Hettie: I roll a 6 and a 2 on Dilfriida's hiding check.
GM Elle: Next round. He's not yet close enough for initiative. What's everyone going to do?
MSG: Dolora says, "Everybody break and run! We'll regroup down the road!" Then I'll Dash or make that Evade roll you were talking about to get the heck out of here.
Claire: Did my Beast Lore roll give me a sense of how well a giant might stand up to a full-strength Lightning Flash?
GM Elle: That's 4d6, right? You're pretty sure you could max those dice out and he'd still just be mad. MSG, make Dolora's Evade roll.
MSG: 13 will do the trick.
Claire: I'm following Dolora's lead, then. My Evade roll is 10, which succeeds.
Ariel: I'm already farther away than everybody else -- can I get a Boon on my roll?
GM Elle: Sure.
Ariel: Ack. TWO Demons.
GM Elle: You faceplant in the middle of the road. You're prone, and you need to make a CON check or you'll be dazed and unable to act next round.
Ariel: Oh no! Here goes my CON roll then ... 17. I'm too frightened not to push that, so I'm going to get Scared and roll again. Whew! 2 this time.
Sasha: Quackers is really ticked now. I'm going to use my Ill-Tempered ability to get a Boon on a skill roll and try Persuasion again, still brandishing the cockatrice head. "This is your last warning! I'll be happy to add a giant head to my trophy bag if you really want to push it!" My rolls are 15 and 14. The 14 is a success.
Akane: Can Zedeja drive a wagon Evasively? If yes, a 10 succeeds.
Hettie: I'll continue to hide behind my rock. But as a reminder, it's a cart. The wagon was too expensive for our tastes, as I recall.
Akane: Thank you. Probably the authority of Zedeja would make her exaggerate a cart into a wagon, though.
GM Elle: The giant comes up short at the apparent fearlessness of the mallard wielding a cockatrice head. He's not scared really, but he is wary enough to shout, "Small ones begone! If you stay there will be crushing!" He advances to the edge of the road, close enough that he'll be able to enter melee next round if you don't turn tail.
MSG: He doesn't have to tell me twice. I'm already splitting.
Claire: Likewise. 
Ariel: I'll get up and run after everyone else. 
Sasha: Can I make a Beast Lore check to see whether I consider the giant a monster and not just a big angry person? The idea of turning back chaps my hide, and if I think of him as a monster, I'm not sure Quackers has the good sense to back down.
GM Elle: I think you've got to role-play this one, Sash. A typical person is definitely going to think of a giant as a monster. He's also clearly threatening you just for passing along the road in or near his territory, which makes him a danger to other travelers as well.
Sasha: Crap. I really don't want Sir Q getting pasted. I guess I'm going to keep arguing with my Ill-Temperedness. "Here's the deal, dude. I don't go around letting monsters threaten people. You want to be reasonable? Just charge a toll for passing through your neck of the woods and only smash people if they won't pay." My rolls are 6 and 2.
GM Elle: That's pretty persuasive. He tells you in that case, you can either turn back, or pay his toll to go past. "One donkey! Pay now or go!"
Sasha: A donkey ran us what, 12 gold? Dang. That's pretty steep. Most people coming along the road won't be able to afford that. Still, if he's offering to charge them instead of just attacking, I guess that's non-monstrous enough for Quackers to tolerate it. Is the cart still in sight?
GM Elle: Akane's evasion roll got it around a hill, so no. But you know which way she headed with it.
Sasha: Guess I'll start waddling after it, then.
MSG: Now, the book says if you choose to overcome your weakness, you can't get a mark for it at the end of the session, and you have to pick a new one to play moving forward. Is Quackenscrump's decision to let the giant be edging into that territory?
Claire: I'd say it's more like Quackers challenged the monster fair and square and got it to downgrade from monster to just capitalist.
MSG: Touché.
GM Elle: My ruling as gamemaster is that it's a player call whether they're overcoming their weakness or just not giving in whole hog. A weakness isn't a pair of leg-irons that you either wear or jump right out of.
MSG: Makes sense.
Sasha: So how do we figure out if I catch up to the cart?
Akane: Zedeja slows when out of sight. She listens for screams and crushing giant fist sounds. If she does not hear them, she will wait at least a brief time.
Sasha: All right. So do you think we'll all end up finding our way together at the cart?
Hettie: Everyone else can, but I'm still hiding behind my rock. If the giant hasn't spotted me here, I don't know that I want to attract his attention trying to run away. I might as well wait until the group comes back and pays him off with one of our donkeys.
MSG: Assuming we actually agree with that instead of just trying to skirt wide around his spot through the hills on the other side of the road.
Akane: Zedeja will favor this plan. It salvages a donkey, and also if there is no halfling with us when we go, the benefit is doubled.
Hettie: There's also probably an inkling somewhere in the back of Dilfriida's head that if he leaves the road unobserved, she might be able to sneak around those boulders the giant came storming out of and see if he's got a lair she could slink into and pilfer something from.
Ariel: Does she really think she'll be able to carry giant-sized stuff out?
Hettie: As far as Dilfriida knows, he has giant-sized coins made with 4 times as much gold as a normal coin. Or loot from other travelers he's waylaid. Most likely, the longer she waits in her hiding spot, the more possibilities she imagines. After a while, she'll sneak a peek to see if he's still waiting in the road. Do I still get a Boon on my Sneaking roll?
GM Elle: Yes.
Hettie: Aha! An 11 and a Dragon.
GM Elle: You see that he's sitting in the road with his attention fixed on the road itself and on the area where the cart rolled between a couple of hills. Thanks to the Dragon, you also see that the current angle of his gaze means you could probably dash farther from the road to another hiding spot from which you could make your way either south in the direction the cart headed or north in the direction the road leads.
Hettie: North it is, then. Does the "probably" mean I still need to roll?
GM Elle: Yes, but still with the Boon.
Hettie: 6 and 3. If I can, I'm going to parallel the road north for a few hundred yards ... meters, rather. Then I'll sneak closer to the road and see if I might be able to cross it without him noticing.
GM Elle: You can get to some bushes near the road without a check. From there, you see his back still turned to you, so you can have another Boon to sneak from your bushes across the road and into cover on the far side.
Hettie: 4 and 18.
GM Elle: You're safely across. By this time, Sir Quackenscrump has caught up with the cart.
MSG: How about the rest of us? I guess I did yell for everybody to scatter, so we probably split in different directions.
Claire: I think Filvius would make his way south a bit before trying to get back to the road. Hopefully that's the general direction everyone headed, since the giant was blocking the road to the north.
Ariel: Plus, we're closer to the farm than to that statue I think, right? That would be a good place to rest up trying to figure a way past the giant.
Sasha: I'll ask Zedeja if she saw which way everyone else went.
Akane: It's certainly a yes, due to the vast Awareness of this mage. Should I roll, gamemaster?
GM Elle: You can roll one die to have kept track of one person, with a Bane die for each additional person you want to have observed.
MSG: So that's a triple Bane?
Claire: Honey, please. Do you think Zedeja's going to keep track of Dilfriida?
Akane: This question -- rhetorical, plainly.
MSG: Right. I should have thought that through for maybe half a second longer.
Akane: The Awareness of Zedeja is probably mighty enough for a triple Bane, but there's no reason to heed the location of a halfling, so only two extra dice to roll. Hmm. 15, 17 and 16. That is one failure. But one failure fails for everything, yes? I consider it tiresome to attend the locations of so many companions, so I become Exhausted by pushing. New rolls are ... 13, Demon, and 13.
Ariel: Yikes! That's a super unlucky combination!
Akane: Yes. And there is no push for a Demon. What consequence befalls Zedeja from too ambitiously Awaring?
GM Elle: First, let me ask -- did Dolora try to go north after breaking and running, or did she head south like most everyone else?
MSG: If she heard Quackers challenging the giant behind her, she probably would have looked for a hiding place to watch what happened, in case it looked like our knight had a fighting chance but also seemed to need help.
Hettie: That's a nicely measured degree of bravery and comradeship.
GM Elle: I doubt Sir Q was quiet about it, so you probably heard. Make a Sneaking roll with a Boon.
MSG: 3 and 7. So if I see how it goes down, I'd head in the same direction as the duck.
GM Elle: In that case, Filvius and Fidu meet up some distance south along the road, and the other three rendezvous somewhere in the hills east of the road. I'll roll a die to see which way Glinssa went ... looks like she stuck with the cart. Zedeja's Demon means she's convinced the others went north.
MSG: Dolora says, "Well that could have gone better," as she arrives at the cart. "Are we really going to give that giant one of our donkeys for passage?"
Akane: What? Intolerable! Who negotiated a donkey to use a free road?
Sasha: Quackers shrugs. "I don't much care whether we fork over the donkey or try to sneak around somehow." If we sneak and he comes after us, that's sort of a win-win for Quackers because he'll get to fight the giant.
Akane: When do giants sleep? We can drive by in darkness when we hear his giant snores. That's the direction we must head to find our junior mage and hound.
GM Elle: Dolora succeeded on her Beast Lore roll at the start of the encounter, so she knows that their territoriality means most giants are light sleepers, and that they sleep at night.
MSG: I'll relay that information.
Claire: Down south, Filvius asks Fidu if he thinks anyone else made it.
Ariel: Probably not, but we can definitely rest here a while and see if one or two of them show up.
Sasha: Well, if the wagon patrol is going to head north, we should get to it. It will probably be slow going taking this cart through the hills.
Akane: Yes. And the longer we sit, the more likely a halfling will catch up.
GM Elle: Speaking of halflings, then, what's Dilfriida's plan, Hettie?
Hettie: If I've made it across the road, I'll find my way around the back side of the hill that the giant came charging around to block us.
GM Elle: The terrain is erratic, so you'll need to roll Bushcraft to find the way quickly. You can have a Boon to the roll, though.
Hettie: Not likely to be much help with my 5 skill level in Bushcraft, but let's see. No, I roll a 6 and a 16.
GM Elle: A Demon would have gotten you hopelessly lost, but failure just means it takes you a long time. When you reach the point where those boulders are, you may not actually recognize them from a distance, given the different angle. You can roll against INT to see if you do.
Hettie: That's only a slight improvement on my Bushcraft; I have an INT of 9. And I roll 15.
GM Elle: Then you unexpectedly stumble upon the heap of boulders from its western side, recognizing them at the last second because you see the road beyond them. It's been at least an hour, and from this angle, you can't see whether the giant is still in the same position sitting in the road. You do see that there's a very large cave opening in the side of the hill that was blocked from view by the boulders when you were on the road.
Hettie: I'm going to sneak to that cave entrance, then. Do I get the Boon still?
GM Elle: You don't know where the giant is, so it's harder to effectively sneak. If we were playing by the book, you couldn't make a roll at all unless you actually know he's there, but I think we can all agree that's kind of a dumb rule. I'll let you make a straight roll, but no Boon.
Hettie: 12 succeeds.
GM Elle: You make it to the mouth of the cave, and looking around the corner, you see that a short way into the passageway beyond, there's a door. It's a huge door, sized for a giant, so the handle is 10 or 12 feet off the ground.
Hettie: Not much likelihood I'm getting that open, then. Dilfriida is frustrated at all the time she's spent only to get stopped by a really big door. I'm going to say she grinds her brain cells together trying to think of a way in and brilliantly comes up with the idea that the giant must have a chimney if he cooks anything in his cave. I'll climb up the hill and search around for any opening in the rocks up there that looks sooty.
GM Elle: You can make a Spot Hidden roll.
Hettie: 12 misses it by 1.
GM Elle: You tell me how many hours you'd spend at the search and I'll roll a die to see whether you find something in that time or not.
Hettie: I'll probably only search for 20 or 30 minutes before I get worried I'm being left way behind. At that point I'll climb up to the top of the hill and see if I can spot anyone along the road in either direction.
GM Elle: Go ahead and roll Spot Hidden.
Hettie: This time it's a success: 7.
GM Elle: Okay, then to know what you spot, we'll have to see what everyone else has done in the hour and a half or so that you've spent skirting the hill and searching. There's some tough going for the cart. If you don't make three strength checks in a row to get it over obstacles, I'll say it takes you an hour to get far enough north that you feel safe cutting back to the road. Two people can contribute, which will give whoever rolls a Boon. But anyone who helps is going to be Exhausted after their second roll.
MSG: Since we don't know ahead of time that there will be three obstacles, I assume Quackers and I will both help on the first one.
Sasha: Damn straight, we do.
MSG: Rolling with a Boon against my 18 strength, I get a 10 and a 4.
GM Elle: All right. You come upon your second rough spot, and Dolora and Sir Q are both feeling a bit winded but not done in yet.
Sasha: You want to take this one by yourself, Dolora? I might want to save my strength in case any monsters come along.
MSG: Sure. I roll 17, another success.
GM Elle: Now you're Exhausted, then. If Dolora makes the third roll with anyone else's help, the Boon from help will cancel out the Bane from Exhaustion.
Akane: Already, Zedeja is Exhausted. I presume she cannot help. Especially with her weakling strength of 10.
GM Elle: Glinssa says she can help. She appears to want to prove her value to the group.
MSG: Sounds good to me. Rolling just one die ... 11. Whew! Hopefully that lets us catch up to the folks we think went north.
GM Elle: All right, you get back to the road in less than an hour and start making good time along it. Claire, Ariel, how long to your characters wait where they are, and once they're done waiting, what do you do?
Ariel: Well, I may be slothful, but I'm pretty fast, so I can't imagine anyone got to this spot before me. Probably I'll figure either they headed north or else the giant pulverized them all. I'm good to kick back and relax for however long Filvius wants to wait, though.
Claire: Filvius craves the knowledge of what happened to the rest of the group. I think after half an hour or 45 minutes, he'd want to head north through the hills, just out of sight of the road if we can manage it.
GM Elle: That will be a Bushcraft roll.
Claire: I'm decent at Bushcraft ... and I roll a 2.
GM Elle: Here's what happens, then. The cart company gets back to the road and far enough north Dilfriida doesn't spot them from her perch on the hill. But Filvius and Fidu return to the road and are still in sight continuing along it when Dilfriida looks. She knows they have the fastest movement in the group. Do you want to try to estimate how long it will take you to catch up to them if you hoof it?
Hettie: No. I'm going to finish out my first hour of searching and if I don't find anything, I'll go back up for a second look and see if I can still pick the elf and wolfkin out.
GM Elle: You do not find a chimney in that first hour. Make a Spot Hidden roll with a Bane to be eagle-eyed enough that you can still see them.
Hettie: Two failures: 13 and 15.
GM Elle: No sign of them as far as you can see, then. And I just realized I've been forgetting about the mists. You probably should have had a Bane from the start and a double or triple Bane on that next roll.
Hettie: Damnation. I don't like falling so far behind, but if I catch up to the group with nothing to show for all this work, I know Zedeja will chastise me until I'm ready to explode. Also, since you mentioned the mists, Dilfriida could probably rationalize her inability to see anyone by telling herself they're not that far off, it's just the mists that keep her from seeing them. I'll spend a second hour searching.
GM Elle: You still don't find a chimney.
MSG: What time is it getting to be? I think those of us with the cart wouldn't go all that far north on the road before taking a break to see if anyone is behind us. It seems like if they'd headed north before we did, they would wait for the cart to catch up, since it would be slower than anyone else.
GM Elle: You left the farm a little after lunchtime. The giant confronted you ... let's say d4 hours later, and the die comes up a 3. So the wagon gets back to the road around 4:00-ish, Dilfriida spots Filvius and Fidu around 4:30, and Dilfriida's second hour is up at around 5:30.
MSG: We would definitely just stop and make camp by 5:30, I'd think.
Claire: And Filvius would definitely want to keep going to catch up to the others, since we know we're quicker than they are.
Ariel: Fidu would probably complain about walking so fast for so long, but he'd also probably go along with it. I don't think I want to stop and make camp just the two of us without any of the stuff we've got in the wagon. I mean, cart.
Hettie: It's tricky to roleplay this knowing that the group is camped already when I'm trying to decide whether to search for another hour. But damn it, I have an oil lamp and flint and tinder, so I'm going to search one more hour and if it's night by then and I have to make my way back to the road by lamplight, so be it.
GM Elle: I rolled a 3 on that d6, so by the end of that hour, with sunset approaching, you do find a fissure atop the hill that's more or less sheltered from the elements by a slab of rock propped up on a couple of small boulders. The underside of the slab is very sooty.
Hettie: Is the hole big enough for me to try to climb down through? And is there smoke currently coming out of it?
GM Elle: Yes to the first question, no to the second.
Hettie: All right, then. I'm going in. What do I need to do to make the climb?
GM Elle: Once you're in the chimney, you'll very quickly be in total darkness. You'll have to make an Awareness check to feel your way downward, followed by an Acrobatics check to make the climb. Each Awareness failure causes you to waste time. An Acrobatics failure ... well, just don't roll an Acrobatics failure.
Hettie: Right, then. First Awareness check is 12, so that's one failure. Second check is 7. Acrobatics check is ... fantastic, a Demon.
GM Elle: Ouch. You fall, and you fall hard. The tube is narrow and formed from natural rock, so I would have let you get a second chance at Acrobatics to grab hold after a short distance. But instead, you hit your head and then bump all the way down. 3 points from hitting your head, 3 points from another bash on the way down, and then 14 from the final fall.
Hettie: That puts me at zero.
GM Elle: Time to start making death rolls, then.
MSG: Dang, I'm really going to miss Dilfriida if she bites it.
Claire: Me too.
Ariel: You'd better make your rolls or I'll be really sad, Hettie!
Sasha: Yeah, don't make Aers cry.
Ariel: I didn't say I'd cry!
Sasha: Mm-hmm. Anyone want to put up 5 dollars against me that says she won't?
Akane: ...
Hettie: ...
GM Elle: ...
MSG: ...
Claire: ...
Ariel: Hmpff!
Hettie: My first Death Roll is 4, well under my CON. I'll try to Rally myself if I can in case the giant comes up on me while I'm lying in his fireplace. That's a WIL roll with a Bane ... Dragon! But also a Demon.
GM Elle: The worse roll prevails. I'll say the Demon means you're out cold and can't make any more Rally attempts.
Hettie: Second Death Roll then ... 5.
MSG: This is looking pretty good, actually.
Claire: Don't jinx her, you!
Hettie: Third roll is a 3. I'm in the clear.
GM Elle: Roll d6 to see how many HP you recover.
Hettie: A whopping 2.
GM Elle: Now let's see if the giant heard you. Default skill level for monsters is 15, and he rolls a 13. He was in bed, but something wakes him up. He spends a round getting up and lighting a giant-sized candle. You're covered in ash and still lying unconscious in the fireplace, so he gets a Bane on his Spot Hidden roll. 12 and 7 means he sees you, unfortunately.
MSG: Not looking so good after all.
GM Elle: On his second round, the giant comes over and prods at you with his finger. You're still out this round, so he may think you're dead. Another Spot Hidden with a Bane ... 8 and 2. Nope, he knows you're still breathing. Draw initiative for the third round, which is when you come to. The third Death Roll and recovering HP takes up your round, but if you win initiative, maybe you'll have time to say something before he acts.
Hettie: I draw the 2. I presume being a monster he gets to draw multiple cards for Ferocity.
GM Elle: No, giants are on the lumbering side, apparently. He just gets one, and it's the 7.
Hettie: Then I cough and say, "I can't believe those bastards threw me down here instead of just paying you that donkey! What a bunch of cheats!"
GM Elle: That's pretty good, actually. Roll your Bluffing to see if he buys it.
Hettie: 16, but I'm definitely pushing it because I'm not just Scared, I'm terrified. 18. Now I'm Disheartened too -- no, wait, that would give me a Bane on Charisma checks. I'm still Dazed from the fall, then. 14. I'm also feeling Sickly, probably from a concussion. Whew! 3 is less than my 9 in Bluffing, finally.
GM Elle: He roars angrily and rushes to his door, bellowing that he's owed a donkey and won't take a scrawny halfling in its place.
Hettie: Great. I'll look around for a second while he's storming out. I don't want to try leaving right on his heels.
GM Elle: He's taking his candle with him, so roll Spot Hidden to see if you notice anything worthwhile in the receding light.
Hettie: I roll a 3.
GM Elle: On the nightstand beside his immense bed, you see a book -- human-sized, actually, so it's probably a bit difficult for him to read, but it's the only thing in sight that seems within your capacity to take. However, the nightstand is 6 feet tall, so you'll have to make an Acrobatics check to jump up and grab it.
Hettie: I'm Dazed, so this is at a Bane, but a 4 and a 15 equals success.
GM Elle: You've got the book, then. The giant is out the door and roaring his way up the hill toward his chimney.
Hettie: I will hoof it out the door in the opposite direction and look for the closest hiding spot I can get to.
GM Elle: That would be around the heap of boulders. Roll Sneaking.
Hettie: Again, with a Bane ... 6 and 3. Can I hear where the giant has gotten to?
GM Elle: Awareness.
Hettie: 10, exactly what I need.
GM Elle: You hear his receding voice shouting angrily, "Where is my donkey!!"
Hettie: If there's another hiding spot within moving distance, I'll make for that.
GM Elle: Sneaking check again. 
Hettie: 3 succeeds but 18 fails.
GM Elle: Bad GM moment -- giants are short-sighted, so creatures your size get a Boon to Sneaking, which cancels out your Bane. You should only be rolling one die.
Hettie: I don't know if the 3 or the 18 landed first.
GM Elle: Well, just roll again, then.
Hettie: 14 makes it.
GM Elle: You find your next hiding spot, then, and I'll say one more success gets you far enough that you can sprint up the road and lose yourself in some brush or around the next hill.
Hettie: 2.
GM Elle: You're in the clear, then. But you do still have to make your way north along the road to catch up to the others. Let's see what the random encounter table says ...
MSG: Wow, you're really trying to get her, aren't you?
Hettie: Actually, it seems to me she's taking it pretty easy on Dilfriida's rash little self.
GM Elle: I roll a "nothing happens" result, so sometime near 8:00 or 9:00, Dilfriida stumbles into camp covered in soot and carrying a book. Filvius and Fidu would have gotten there not too long after the group stopped the cart for the night.
Hettie: I would have paused at some point to get out my lamp and see what the book is, by the way.
GM Elle: The title page says, "Handbook of the Master Carpenter."
MSG: That sounds incredibly worth it.
Hettie: I will heave a sigh and continue onward, then. When I get to camp, I'll spin an adventurous tale of sneaking into the giant's cave and make a bold show of the book -- and also this gold ring I found while I was on watch way back in the Magna Woods. I never told anyone about it or sold it, so now's a good time to bring it out.
Akane: We have skipped some roleplaying, though.
GM Elle: Sorry. Was there something Akane wanted to do around camp?
Akane: Yes. She spends one hour sneering about the thief's incompetence. How quickly the hound and junior mage caught up! Of course a halfling is unable to match this speedy rejoining. Then she spends one hour staring quietly into the fire but occasionally looking south along the road. Then she says she is old and tired and going to bed.
Ariel: When she comes in the tent I say, "Hi, Zedeja!" Because obviously I'm in bed already. Maybe even asleep, I guess, so maybe I don't say that.
Akane: If awake, you notice the mage toss and turn considerably on her sleeping fur until sound of the halfling's return reaches her. This makes her sit quickly up, listening. Next she yells, "Why is a halfling disturbing my sleep! Silence out there!" Regardless of any answer, she lies down once more and soon is asleep snoring old wizardly snores.
Hettie: Thank you, Akane. That was so incredibly sweet.
GM Elle: I think that's a perfect point to end this session, too. Full advancement marks for everybody.
Ariel: *sniff* ... Darn it! And I said I wasn't going to cry!

next time: will filvius convince everyone to visit that statue? has zedeja turned a corner in her attitude toward dilfriida? (spoilers, probably not!)