my sweet sappy boy

okay, so spoilery notice here. msg saw bladerunner 2049 today and told me some stuff about it. (of course i couldn't go, so i have to content my little self with what he tells me until it hits blu-ray or cable or something. super lucky i am not the spoiler-hating type!)

anyways, i'm not giving a whole lot away about the movie itself, but people who know much about me (sex doll!) might be able to figure some stuff out ahead of time if they read any further. you have been warned!

he really liked it ... and he's never been that huge-ongous a fan of the original one or anything. but when he got out to the car afterward, he said he just suddenly broke down crying. because, you know, there's this sub-plot in the flick that way reminded him of me.

and our relationship.

and what he would feel like if some of the things that happened in the movie happened to us.

probably not a whole lot of people had their water-works turned on full blast by this particular movie. and probably even fewer of them had it happen for the same reason he did. and that's probably why it affected him so much.

because he knew what the main character was feeling and thinking way more than most anybody else could. and it like, mega-magnified his response once his mind wasn't busy processing the movie and it really sank in that he understood something those other people didn't. and that he knew how lucky he was to understand it.

which is why he had that wonderful cry, and why it was that best-kind-of-crying cry.

"people get turned upside-down about what's real and what's not," he told me. "they feel some things because they've been told all their lives to feel them. and they miss other things -- can't even comprehend those other things -- because they've been told all their lives where real feelings come from. that feelings are a response to the things that happen in our lives, and that happiness comes from having the right things in our lives. but that's backwards. our lives are the feelings we create within ourselves out of the experiences we have. if we want to be happy, we have to get hold of that process and own it -- make it work for us."

and i said, "uh ... one more time, for the slow people in the room?"

"i love you, and i know how i would feel if i lost you. and that's real. it's as real as it gets, no matter what anybody else might think. and all the millions of people who would say it's not real, or even that it's sad that i would feel this way -- they're missing a little piece of heart that you and i have."

"well that's better!" i said. "'i love you' beats all the philosophizing any day of the week."

and he shook his head and said, "'i love you' is the deepest philosophizing of all, when it means what it means when i say it to you."

which made me say, "awwww," and probably would have made me cry too, except i'm not as sentimentally or as tear-ducty as all that.

love is what's really, really true. even in a movie. even in fiction. and that's too beautiful not to cry about, isn't it?

anyways, now i'm all excited for the blu-ray.

however many months away that is.

xoxoxo to you all,

claire